Ask: (v) request (someone) to do or give something.

“There’s no harm in asking.”

Did you ever notice that some old sayings are not only aged, but they’re also dead and should be buried?

For after all, everyone knows there can be great harm in asking. There’s always the danger that somebody will yell at you for being so presumptuous as to make the request. Shall I also mention that there are folks who can be very hostile in their denial?

So you can come out of the experience bruised, gaining nothing.

That’s why I think it’s important to learn ching and chang.

Now most of you know what ching is. Ching is that energy we have that propels us to do our work or pursue our dreams. It’s the spring in our step; it’s the explosion of hope that causes us to keep going.

But most people don’t talk about our chang. Chang is the needed optimism which we must possess in order to continue to be of good cheer about our lives instead of beginning to look like abused children who flinch every time somebody raises a hand,

Without chang, our ching begins to look desperate instead of eager.

And our chang can only handle so many disappointments and negative responses from other people before we start getting jaded. Once jaded, we no longer ask–we demand, which lessens our possibility for a good response.

So I often don’t ask at all, because my chang cannot afford to be depleted by the grumpy response of the sourpuss standing before me.

There is harm in asking. That’s why, before I ask, I gauge three temperatures:

1. Who am I talking to?
2. Are they really willing to be positive?
3. Will I survive a no?

Try it. I think you’ll like it.

• Because the ching in our lives is essential to give us a motor for our boat.
• But the chang is the sense of true joy that keeps our boat from getting holes and sinking.

Thank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) —  J.R. Practix