Tag Archives: carcass

Blew

Blew: (v) past tense of blow

Dictionary BThere is great human wisdom in refusing to allow others to rob us of our moment of honesty.

If they need to extract the truth from us, we will lose all the brownie points from uttering it.

If we’re at the mercy of the scrutiny of critics, we will suddenly find ourselves living in a society in which critics have as much prominence as those who create.

The most powerful statement I will ever make in my life is, “I blew it”–especially if I’m able to squeeze in that confession before others leap upon my carcass.

Matter of fact, let’s look at the conjugation of this process:

  • I blow things.
  • I blew this.
  • It is blown.

A delightful process.

First of all, to have the courtesy to warn people that we are capable of blowing it.

Then to inform the tourists that the journey will be interrupted by the fact that we blew it.

And finally, to have that intelligence to know that something is blown and beyond repair, instead of reaching for the duct tape.

It’s inevitable.

I will need to admit that I blew it so I will not continue to chase the tail of what ends up being a dead dog.

Therefore, be careful.

When you think something is going to be a breeze, you are more likely to “blow it.”

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Beetle

Beetle: (n) an insect of an order distinguished by forewingsDictionary B

It’s a language which I have affectionately, but sarcastically, dubbed “Marjorian.”

It was named in honor of a woman I once knew named Marjory.

Marjory had developed a way of speaking in which she would address any problem that ended up falling in her front yard with very gentle language, while summarizing the actions of others she did not like with more sinister terms.

Let me give you an example.

When Marjory’s daughter became pregnant in high school, she insisted they had planned on having the young girl marry her beau, but the pavilion they wanted to use was not available, so normally the pregnancy would have fallen after the marriage, but preceded it only because of a scheduling conflict.

Yet when the young girl next door found herself with an unwanted pregnancy at age seventeen, Marjory whispered to the neighbors that “the lass was a tramp” and that such declining morals were ruining our country.

She spoke Marjorian–a language generous to oneself while condemning to others.

I bring this up because one day I was sitting in Marjory’s home and a bug crawled across the floor. Instinctively I leaped to my feet and crushed it with my foot. I knew the insect to be a roach. When I identified the bug to Marjory, she immediately disagreed and said, “No, no. That’s a beetle.”

Apparently it was completely respectable to have a beetle crawl across your floor but not a roach.

Being in a playful mood, I picked up the remains of the bug and carried it over to Marjory, causing her to launch into a hissy fit.

I put it toward her face, showing her that this bug had no wings, and was therefore not a beetle.

Without missing a beat, Marjory countered by saying that “it was a Japanese beetle. They don’t have wings.”

I immediately realized that Marjory had no idea of the flight habits of the Japanese beetle. But it was not worth arguing about, so I tossed the carcass into the garbage can, finished my conversation and coffee and was on my way.

I have met many people who have their own dialect of “Marjorian” language, but it always amazes me that after all the claims are made, all the exaggerations espoused and all the false belief preached, that somehow or another… the truth still has a way of winning the day.

 

 

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