Tag Archives: monsters

Cynophobia

Cynophobia: (n) an irrational fear of dogs

Sometimes I am hesitant to tell you a story because I fear you will think I am pulling your leg (or tugging on your heart).

Just like all writers, I am guilty of some embellishment, but generally speaking, the plot line, characters and conclusions actually happened in some way, shape or form.

While traveling in Texas (which, by the way, could be the beginning of a dozen novels…)

Anyway, I found myself in a tiny community just south of Austin.

It was a place that was proud of being tiny, away from Austin and south.

Need I say more?

I came in with my music group to put on a series of concerts in the region—because apparently the person who did our scheduling hated us.

Our music was too hip, our clothes were too modern, my hair was too long and the girls had that look in their eyes—of equal rights.

The whole event was a struggle, which we were actually succeeding in overcoming. That is, until they told us where we would be staying.

A lady offered her mobile home as a place for us to stay.

She failed to explain to us that she bred pit bulls.

She explained that she would not be there to greet us, but that the trailer would be open, and to “just go on in.” It never crossed my mind to ask about dogs.

So, driving up in our van, suddenly seven of the little monsters came running to the fence, alternating their barking. Three on one side, four on the other, back to the three on the one.

It was like a hellish chorus from a Wagner opera.

The animals stared at us—an uncomfortable probing, as if they were sizing up how long it would take to get us to the ground for the final kill.

One of the girls—who believed “doggies were really sweet”—thought she would step up to the fence and greet them, to see if she could allay their fear of strangers. As she did, one of the beasts from the left-hand chorus leaped up, sank his teeth into her purse and would not let go. We were barely able to free her from the purse so that the dog would not drag her into the pit of death and terminate her singing career.

We stood at the fence, gazing at these creatures for ten minutes. Twenty minutes. We were silent because nobody had any good idea on how to get into the house without being partially consumed.

After about three-quarters of an hour, the owner arrived and asked us why we hadn’t “gone on in.”

Without saying a word, all three of us pointed to the gathered horde.

She ridiculed us—especially me. She said, “You claim to be a man and you’re afraid of these puppies? What a pussy! They won’t hurt you!”

She then tossed her hair and looked at the three of us, saying, “Come on. Follow me. They won’t bother you.”

She was wrong–the dogs knew we were spooked.

Every time we tried to follow her through the fence, they jumped into the air, ready to attack.

At this point, the young woman turned to us, astonished, and said, “I don’t know what’s going on. They’re never like this. Did you do anything to hurt them?” We shook our heads. She continued. “It’s like they know you’re dangerous or something. Do you have evil spirits?”

Well, this was too far for me.

I declared, “Well, actually, we have good spirits. And apparently, these demon mutts are out to swallow them.”

The lady did not like my response. She headed inside, saying, “When you get up the courage, come on in.”

Seeing her leave, the dogs gritted their teeth, content that they had us to themselves. The girls in the group were stymied but I wasn’t.

I was unashamedly experiencing cynophobia.

I had officially met dogs who were not puppies, but instead, possessed the Mark of The Beast.

We went to a Holiday Inn, which, by the way, did not allow pets.

funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

Combative

Combative: (adj) ready or eager to fight; pugnacious.

No one who has been to war is anxious to get back.

No soldier who’s seen his buddy explode next to him is convinced that the flag is worth such a horrible sacrifice.

No general yearns to put his plans to the test in the field of blood and gore unless he is completely out of his mind.

But in the same theme, none of us should ever walk into a room knowing we haven’t had enough sleep, haven’t worked out a conflict in our lives or are reluctantly participating in an event–and subject those around us to our combative nature.

In a gathering of a hundred people who are circling around and fellowshipping, it only takes three individuals slipped into the mix, who have shown up in bad moods and ready to argue, to turn the remaining ninety-seven into either frightened victims or triggered their angry monsters.

The human race is combative.

Somehow or another we have convinced ourselves that war changes boundaries or establishes authority.

All war does is steal away a generation of fertile, creative and productive minds.

 

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Alter Ego

dictionary with letter A

Alter ego: (n) a person’s secondary or alternative personalityCould you keep up with two?? Personalities, that is?

Yet I think sometimes we, as human beings, try to maintain an arsenal of personalities under the guise of being diverse, clever, intuitive and powerful.

Actually, there are two philosophies that collide with each other, and as often happens in science, when the two things collide, they cancel each other out.

  • The first philosophy is that we are able to “become all things to all men.”
  • The second one is, “all you have to do is be yourself.”

As always, somewhere between these two monsters lies the frightened child of truth.

If you try to be too varied, people call you wishy-washy, liberal or ill-defined.

Yet if you foolishly go out into the world and try to “be yourself” all the time, you will soon offend others and find yourself alone except for those who hold to your position.

There is a third possibility. “As much as possible, live peaceably with all men.”

I like that one.

Sometimes I find that my personality isn’t suited for the environment, so I just give it the night off. I decide not to be too chatty. I find a lovely corner near the buffet table, sit down and let people find me instead of circulating around, to the annoyance of many and the delight of very few.

Then there are times when there are issues which demand that I stand up for a cause. I have discovered there is really only one cause worth standing up for. Whenever human beings feel like they are advancing their cause by making other people to be less valuable than themselves, I must step in with my personality and object.

Other than that, I have found that letting things just play out normally (and even historically) proves to have sufficient punishment for bad ideas.

I am not always myself–because in some adventures, “me” is not needed.

But I certainly do not try to be so open-minded that my brain cannot close a door to create a sense of privacy.

I try to “live peaceably with all men”–unless they are determined to declare a war on their neighbors.


Adroit

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter AAdroit: (adj.) clever or skillful in using the hands or the mind: e.g. he was adroit at tax avoidance.

A time or two I have actually tried to USE the word, but I was never able to get it completely out of my mouth without giggling.

First of all, it’s much easier to say “accomplished,” and also clearer to the listener. But mostly, when I say “adroit” I have to think of a droid. And when I think of a droid, I start conjuring visions of R2D2 or C-3PO.

And then I smile and chortle.

Some words were just never meant to be used. Or maybe they’ve been destroyed by other words that came in and sucked up all the air in the room.

I suppose it would be fun to say that C-3PO was adroit at being a droid. But that’s the kind of pun and cleverness which in our generation makes people groan instead of laugh.

Yes, humor has changed. It has to be brazen and perhaps even a little risqué nowadays to get an exuberant response from an audience. A simple play on words leaves people thinking that you’re old-fashioned or kind of silly.

But anyway, back to “adroit”–I have to conclude that it’s one of those words which if I used, everybody in the room would get that “W-h-a-a-t??” face and then become annoyed that I was trying to be overly smart instead of communicating coolly.

And then, like me, they would probably pull up the idea of a droid instead, which might take them to Aliens, where the monsters had acid for blood and the artificial life form was possessed by one of the villains.

See? It just makes me digress.

So I shall stay away from “adroit” because of its pretentious sound and reference to robots.

I hope the word will not feel shunned.

Even though, if you think about it, “adroit” and “shunned” are very similar in their practical use.