by J. R. Practix

Abrupt: (adj.) 1. sudden and unexpected 2. brief to the point of rudeness; curt.

I had an uncle who was abrupt.

He would have disagreed with that assessment, because if you ever accused him of being too abrupt, he would simply say that he was honest, forthcoming, didn’t pull punches and “called ’em like he saw ’em.”

Here’s the problem with being abrupt: it creates a climate of abruptness. There is one certain thing about the dynamics of planet earth–things do beget each other. I think the statistic is that 88% of the time, if you smile at someone, they will smile back. Of course, I don’t know what the statistic would be on how many people would frown at you if you frown at them, but I’m sure it’s pretty high.

The difficulty with people who deem themselves honest is that they don’t like it very well when you return the favor. They prefer to be considered the one “blessed with honesty,” and also–obviously–endowed with perfection.

So over the years I have learned that whatever words I select and weave together to present as a tapestry for others to view is going to end up being worn by me. Sometimes, those words are even returned without any kindness.

So even though we have tried to tone down the definitions of words like “argument, vitriol, attack and nastiness,” referring to them as debate, discussion, dialogue and “keeping ’em honest,” will result in aggravated fussiness.

Abrupt people are always attacked for being abrupt and generally speaking, recoil with a new batch of meanness, which they continue to insist is candor. Eventually we just end up insulting each other like two bullies on a playground, trying to become King of the Hill.

So is there a time to be abrupt? Yes. If you see me walking out in front of a bus, feel free to abruptly stop me. If I’m at the grocery store, reaching my hand into a bunch of bananas, and there’s a tarantula crawling nearby, feel free to  abruptly kill the little booger.

But if it’s fairly clear that time will allow for some discretion and gentleness, I would rather you NOT be abrupt, but instead, soothe me into compliance. Yes–take the lanolin of a sweet nature to convince me of your better ways.

Some people think this is slick and a bunch of gamesmanship. But as much as we may not like a used car salesman complimenting us on our outfit when we know we’re dressed in our worst, we have to admit there would be nothing more atrocious than somebody trying to abruptly sell us a car.

by J. R. Practix

Abrupt: (adj.) 1. sudden and unexpected 2. brief to the point of rudeness; curt.

I had an uncle who was abrupt.

He would have disagreed with that assessment, because if you ever accused him of being too abrupt, he would simply say that he was honest, forthcoming, didn’t pull punches and “called ’em like he saw ’em.”

Here’s the problem with being abrupt: it creates a climate of abruptness. There is one certain thing about the dynamics of planet earth–things do beget each other. I think the statistic is that 88% of the time, if you smile at someone, they will smile back. Of course, I don’t know what the statistic would be on how many people would frown at you if you frown at them, but I’m sure it’s pretty high.

The difficulty with people who deem themselves honest is that they don’t like it very well when you return the favor. They prefer to be considered the one “blessed with honesty,” and also–obviously–endowed with perfection.

So over the years I have learned that whatever words I select and weave together to present as a tapestry for others to view is going to end up being worn by me. Sometimes, those words are even returned without any kindness.

So even though we have tried to tone down the definitions of words like “argument, vitriol, attack and nastiness,” referring to them as debate, discussion, dialogue and “keeping ’em honest,” will result in aggravated fussiness.

Abrupt people are always attacked for being abrupt and generally speaking, recoil with a new batch of meanness, which they continue to insist is candor. Eventually we just end up insulting each other like two bullies on a playground, trying to become King of the Hill.

So is there a time to be abrupt? Yes. If you see me walking out in front of a bus, feel free to abruptly stop me. If I’m at the grocery store, reaching my hand into a bunch of bananas, and there’s a tarantula crawling nearby, feel free to  abruptly kill the little booger.

But if it’s fairly clear that time will allow for some discretion and gentleness, I would rather you NOT be abrupt, but instead, soothe me into compliance. Yes–take the lanolin of a sweet nature to convince me of your better ways.

Some people think this is slick and a bunch of gamesmanship. But as much as we may not like a used car salesman complimenting us on our outfit when we know we’re dressed in our worst, we have to admit there would be nothing more atrocious than somebody trying to abruptly sell us a car.