Knowing your limitations is important…and annoying.
Importantly annoying. To a certain degree, that summarizes adult life.
When I was a much younger man, I became quite enamored with the hippie philosophy–but more or less the attire rather than the ideals.
Now, let me make it clear that I am a chubby fellow. (Chubby is the generous word I use today for “fat.”)
But I did love the flowered shirts and the bandanas which were often worn on the head, to look cool and maybe have some practical purpose which certainly escaped my perception.
So since they did not make these flowered shirts in my size, I had a girlfriend make one for me. Unfortunately, the material I chose was literally covered with flowers, and she made it a little too big and irregular around the collar, so it kind of draped me at the chest.
But I slid on a bandana and proudly donned my new shirt and went out into society to establish my uniqueness. Much to my chagrin, the first four people who saw me referred to me as “ma’am.”
You see, when you’re chubby and wear a blousy flowered shirt, it does appear to be a blouse. Add a bandana and you look a little like you’re heading off into the field to pick lettuce.
So I was greatly offended, but rather than abandoning my clothing choice, I decided to grow a mustache to enhance my masculine image. Unfortunately, most people just thought the circus had come to town and they had caught the Bearded Lady on “Shave Day.”
It was embarrassing.
It made me defensive.
So my life as a hippie was very brief, and eventually I found it safer to reject the bandana in favor of a baseball cap.
To my delight, almost immediately … I was once again viewed as a dude.
Thank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) — J.R. Practix
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