Tag Archives: aversion

Bedwetting

Bedwetting: (n) involuntary urination during sleep.Dictionary B

Let me see.

We have Traffic Court. It is used very effectively for handling traffic cases.

Then there’s Divorce Court–for those who want to split the sheets in a legal way.

Family Court, which is more or less an oxymoron, since usually those who attend are having great difficulty being a family.

We have the Court of Appeals, which is obviously desperate for attention.

Yet over the years, we have gradually eroded the power and importance of the “Kid Court.”

This is the jurisdiction and judgments levied by children upon each other, creating the natural peer pressure which promotes general civility.

Let’s make something clear: refusing to pee in your bed is not a natural conclusion.

We are born urinating everywhere. We don’t care–take the diaper off too quickly and the baby will do it right in your face.

So somewhere along the line, we develop an aversion to the idea of peeing ourselves.

This has to come through some sort of instruction or protocol which forces us to fall in line and urinate in porcelain instead of linen.

I contend that every time we try to find a reason for bedwetting–other than the fact that the kid has not yet figured out to get up from a sleepy condition and void–we become overwrought, over-analytical and refuse to let “Kid Court” take care of the matter.

I occasionally peed the bed until the time I went to kindergarten. I thought everybody did.

So one day at recess, when someone complimented my pants, I explained that they were my second choice, since I had pissed on the others.

There was a silence that fell over the crowd that day near the merry-go-round. All my fellow students stared at me in disbelief. They had already made the journey away from bedwetting.

They did not bully me.

They did not ridicule me.

But it was made clear that until I learned how to use my “pee-pee’er” at the right time, I could not be “one of the gang.”

It put a crease in my brain so deep that it remains to this day.

I will tell you that nothing my mother or father could have said would have been more effective than the reaction of my chums, who found my conduct to be Neanderthal.

Taking away all peer pressure, which allows for kids to work out many foibles and weird inclinations, is a huge mistake. The best thing we can do is stand back and monitor it–and pull them apart just short of bloody noses.

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Aversion

Aversion: (n) a strong dislike or disinclination.dictionary with letter A

My prejudices are not more precious and beautiful simply because they’re hatched in my well-cared-for mental factory.

I know this.

Yet I wonder sometimes if scolding my personal attitudes that seem distasteful might not be a futile action, considering the fact that some of the things I dislike just might be universally annoying.

But I don’t like stereotypes. Stereotypes exist because specific sounds, attitudes and stupidities blare out at us–often at piercing decibels.

Is it possible to address things that are human-unfriendly without coming across as either a bigot or completely out of step with the progress of society?

For you see, I have some strong aversions. I usually keep them to myself. Why? Because I think they’re prejudices. But part of the time, I also think they’re intelligent insights which just might help the human race to truly evolve instead of monkeying around by accepting the ridiculous.

I will share them with you, understanding that I may come across as bizarre or arcane:

  1. I do not like it when young girls talk like they live in Southern California near the beach, unable to correctly form consonants.
  2. While we’re still on the talking situation, if I found myself to be a person of color, I would do everything in my power to cease speaking with a Southern accent, thereby impersonating my former oppressors.
  3. Fat people should not eat at buffets. Put it in a carryout box and take it home. For since I am a fat person, I am fully aware that if I don’t eat slowly and lightly at the buffet, everyone in the room will assume they understand the heights and depths of my gluttony.
  4. Women cannot achieve equality by insisting they are superior to men.
  5. Men cannot achieve equality by pretending in front of their friends that they think women are smarter than men.
  6. I think black Americans do a disservice to themselves by referring to their race as African-American. There isn’t any one of them who would last five minutes on the African continent.
  7. I would like to live in a world where rock and roll music can be enjoyed without buying into the culture of drugs, illicit sex and profane lyrics.
  8. I think rap music should be allowed but should be considered just as seriously as one values an organ recital at your church. In other words, you’re glad it’s there because it enhances the culture, but you probably won’t show up.
  9. Anyone who is political is unhelpful. Life is not political–it’s unpredictable. And if you’re not prepared to make adjustments toward what works, you will get trapped into what doesn’t.
  10. Stop telling me that you have found a solution to a problem only to tell me next week that the solution offered ends up causing cancer.

There are 10 right off the top of my head without even breaking a sweat.

Wait! There’s an 11th:

People who tell me that breaking a sweat will make me healthier… who end up in the emergency room with pulled muscles, broken bones and heart attacks.

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