Dalmatian

Dalmatian: (n) a breed of dog with short having a white coat marked with black or brown spots

Sandra Gunderson was a dog-breeder, though she hated the term. She preferred connector, love-birther or canine dating service.

She had a very successful business. She advertised all black dogs or pure white dogs.

There were no other markings on them—no little white bowties on the black ones or dark streaks streak on the nose of the white ones.

When people wanted a black dog or a white dog, Sister Gunderson was the lady to come to, and find your dream pet.

Then one day, strangeness took over, as it often does.

While delivering the latest litter, emerging from the loins of Mama Dog was a completely different creature:

A white dog with black splotches.

Or was it a black-splotched dog with a white background?

Ms. Gunderson was so shocked by the appearance of this mutant that she decided to take it away and nurse it on her own, far from the other puppies, and maybe keep it around the barn—to scare away strangers.

But lo and behold, before she could enact her plan, the McKenzies came with their eight-year-old daughter. She was in the throes of celebrating her birthday and they planned to purchase a puppy and saw the bespeckled creature with the white skin and black splotches.

The little girl immediately fell in love with this surprise visitor.

Word spread quickly, and before too long, folks who had wanted white dogs or black dogs suddenly demanded black and white dogs.

It was very tricky. Ms. Gunderson had to wait until a spotted male came out of the black and white dogs to mate with a female from the first batch. And then—no guarantees.

All sorts of configurations appeared.

In about the twelfth generation, the exact mix were birthed and ready for sale.

She sold so many that she couldn’t keep up with the demand. She had to link with some other nearby breeders and work as a team—to make more and more black on whites.

Dalmatians–that’s the name they came up with.

They were so cute that Walt Disney made a movie about a hundred and one of ’em.

After Sandra went to see the Disney movie, she remembered how it all began. She had been mighty close to doing away with that young pup, which appeared, refusing to be white or black.

She was shocked at its look and equally as stunned when the appearance of the dog ended up being a winner.

Just like Sister Gunderson, I, too, occasionally think of the things that have come into our human lives that were first startling—out of step—and seemed to be misfit for our cause.

And now they are celebrated.

So am I a white dog?

Am I a black dog?

Am I a Dalmatian?

Nah. I’m just a mutt.

Conjure

Conjure: (v) to bring to mind

“We’ve got to stop this fussing!” he said in a fussy manner to a gathered audience which was fussy about the circumstances of a country that seemed to always be fussing.

It has been my decision to remain apolitical. I’ve also decided to become a-economical and a-religious.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

This is not because I don’t believe in America, business or even God, for that matter. I just find that fussing and worrying over such issues never conjures the right spirits.

Whether we like it or not, we do beckon emotions and energy in our direction. It’s not a spooky thing–it’s a practical principle of magnetism.

If the world around us wants to be gloomy, angry and feel forsaken, the only way you can get the attention of such a market is by conjuring this profile–doing your best imitation of being a miserable misfit.

After all, if the goal is to be famous, prosperous or well-known, you must slide into the lane presently provided, which seems to be pissed off and talkative.

Yet looking ahead to the future life of our children–or even, in a broad perspective, our grandchildren–a world that is constantly scratching imaginary itches will eventually bleed out and die.

It is my intention that by refusing to join the rabble, I might be able to conjure something rousing.

 

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