Words from Dic(tionary)
Allocate: (v) to distribute duties or resources for a particular purpose.
I have discovered over the years that the best way for me to move forward in success and personal appeal is to extract as much fussiness from my ego and body language as humanly possible.
Even though we will occasionally tolerate a bit of sassiness in one another, we eventually grow weary in well-doing and begin to plot the social death of such aggravating creatures.
With that in mind, I cautiously present to you that one of my pet peeves is the word “allocate.”
I don’t like to be allocated.
Over the years I have acquired a toleration for the process because I live in a world where progress is ignored in favor of the worship of committees. Sometimes I feel it might be better if chaos, anarchy, or at least wild abandon permeated our species, and we spent more time correcting our mistakes than we do planning our indecision.
Just the action of “allocating” has an arrogance to it–as if we have asked God to step down from His throne and allow us to be Kings for a Day.
Let me be the first (or maybe the second) to shout aloud: “I don’t know what I’m doing!”
It isn’t that I lack experience, or that I’m less intelligent than you. It’s just that I’m fully aware that allocating love, finance, mission, mercy or direction to other people is well beyond my expertise.
I am extraordinarily suspicious of those who pull on a tie, sport a smug grin and in great detail explain why certain things can not happen because they can’t be “allocated in this environment.”
As I said, it is a bit of fussiness. And I am certainly not opposed to hearing good counsel or even being submissive to the powers that be.
But for God’s sake, can we say we really believe in a Divine Creator if we never ask Him to do anything that doesn’t add up on our human-held abacus?
- If I don’t ask God to lift weights that are heavier than my allocation, what’s the purpose of prayer?
- And if I don’t think you can do more than what I think you can, based upon the limitations I have placed upon you, what is the value of friendship?
I am sure the intentions of “allocate” are good–and I will try to be less growly on these subjects.
But for the time being, I will continue to leave “allocate” and all of his relatives off my Christmas card list.