Tag Archives: real estate agent

Barnstorming

Barnstorming: (v) to make a rapid tour of an area, typically as part of a political campaign.Dictionary B

Many years ago, I was in the process of purchasing a house. I remember arriving at one prospective residence, stepping in the door, and immediately having my nostrils attacked by a ferocious amount of stinky.

I immediately knew there was a dead rat in the house. (Maybe it wasn’t actually a rat; maybe it was a cat or dog. But somewhere in that home was a dead creature that was decaying.)

I turned to the real estate agent and asked him if he smelled it, and fearing that he was about to lose a sale, he pretended to be oblivious to the nasal assault.

I just laughed at him.

I feel the same way when I tune into America today during our political season. Even though the barnstorming of rallies is filled with music, cheers, banners and funny-looking hats, I smell a rat.

It stinks.

I turn to people around me to see if they notice the same repellent odor and most of them are wearing the banners, hats and reciting the slogans, so they feel compelled to ignore the putrification.

I have no such loyalty.

I sniff rotting ideas being passed off as acceptable.

I don’t care if you’re Republican, Democrat or Independent–you can barnstorm away but I will be sniffing for the smell. Here are the four things that stink up American democracy:

1. “We have got to get rid of them because…”

If we’re a democracy, we can’t get rid of anybody. We can try to channel, adjust, expand, get creative with approaches or admit that we’re ignorant of what to do, but freedom is freedom.

2. “What they’re doing overseas is so bad that we…”

I don’t know why we’re in such a hurry to pick a fight. I guess it’s because we spent so much money on military toys that we feel like we should at least play with them.

Here’s a clue: the more we stay out of wars, the less people will die. Just a thought.

3. “It’s against the Law of God…”

Well, since God is not here to be His own attorney, we’re relying on your interpretation of His statutes. It’s called “hearsay.” That interpretation needs to be mingled with an understanding of Constitutional American law.

Yes, there is a Caesar we answer to and there is a God we answer to, and you can’t take what was meant for liberty and Caesar and question it by citing God.

4. “That Party doesn’t do anything right, but we…”

In my lifetime I have watched Republicans do stupid things and good things. Likewise, the Democrats have had their share, going both ways.

The difference between complete fiasco and partial fiasco is how cool-headed, practical and willing our leaders are.

  • A reactionary Republican or Democrat always do equal damage.
  • A peace-making Republican or Democrat are a glory to all of us.

Let the barnstorming begin.

I will be sniffing for rats.

When I smell them, I will tell you–and you can either pretend they don’t exist because they’re part of your house … or admit that you smell them, too.

 

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Awning

Awning: (n) material stretched on a frame and used to keep the sun or rain off a storefront, window, doorway, or deck.

Years ago I bought a very large house.dictionary with letter A

I did so because I could–probably the worst reason for becoming a land baron.

The home I purchased was a gorgeous castle sitting high on a hill, snubbing its doorway to its lesser-constructed neighbors.

One of the features on the outside, above the windows were awnings–colorful, contrasting, and made of canvas.

The first time I saw them I thought they were a little bizarre. But the realtor convinced me they were quite the conversation piece and would someday assist in the resale of the house.

About a year after my purchase, these awnings became dreary and dull in color from the heat of the sun and elements pounding on them. It became obvious to everyone that they needed to be replaced.

I didn’t even question it.

I felt that my great revelation in the matter was that this time I would buy material for the awnings that matched the coloration of the house instead of contrasting.

God, I thought I was smart. Matter of fact, for a full two weeks I walked around bragging about my wisdom.

In pursuing these new awnings, I discovered they were very expensive. It didn’t matter–I was going to enact my interpretation of great awning display.

So after many weeks, many delays and many overages in cost, the new awnings were on my home.

As the man was fitting the last awning onto the final window, he explained that this particular material would only last about three years.

I nodded my head, portraying myself to be well-versed in the lifespan of the typical awning.

He said to me, “At that point, you can get new awnings and I will guarantee you the same price.”

I interrupted him by expressing my appreciation for his generosity.

And then he concluded: “Of course, the truth is, this house doesn’t really need awnings on it, does it?”

At this point I looked at my house with new eyes.

As it turns out, I had followed the wishes of the previous owner–to place awnings on the house for decoration–only feeling superior because my choice of color was more insightful.

I could have saved thousands of dollars if I had gone with an “awningless” home.

For after all, the only thing those awnings ever did was add a little bit of spruce… while they taunted me with their ever-evident depreciation.

 

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