Tag Archives: screenplay

Cello

Cello: (n) a bass instrument of the violin family, held upright on the floor between the legs of the seated player.

I wrote a screenplay called “The Drive.” I will not go into detail about the storyline because that is not the essence and purpose for this little sharing.

Yet there was a passage in this movie where I envisioned a cello solo to extend over about a four-and-a-half minute period of time.

I do not play cello.

My experience with the cello is seeing them from a distance in the orchestra, and hearing it performed by Yo-Yo Ma.

But I trudged ahead, wrote the composition, and hired a well-recommended cellist. I sent her the music, she arrived and we set out to record.

I found it difficult to hide my disappointment.

You see, I had always envisioned the cello to be this smooth-sounding, basal instrument of gentle tones. But as this professional played my passage, she was plagued with buzzes, growls and all sorts of foreign intonations.

A friend of mine who had been in orchestras for many years, explained to me that many cellos could be bowed and sound nearly smooth as silk–but if you planned on using it as a solo instrument, it often produced various noises of lamentation. She pointed out to me that on the Beatles song, “Yesterday” and the Rolling Stones, “Ruby Tuesday,” that the cello is quite prevalent, but very buzzy.

I cannot tell you that I ever got used to all the personalities of the cello. I still prefer it to sound like a warm-hearted bass-singing angel.

But when it was all said and done, the piece of music was perfect, and did exactly what it was supposed to do.

Honestly, I can’t say that about myself.

 

Donate ButtonThank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) —  J.R. Practix 

 

B Movie

B movie: (n) a low-budget movie

Dictionary B

I have written twenty feature-length screenplays.

Thirteen of them have been made into independent films.

Let me explain something: no one sets out to make a bad movie. No one wants their movie to slip to “Letter B” in the alphabet.

There are four things that determine the fate of a movie.

1. Since it is definitely over-written, as all scripts are, picking and choosing what to cut out is similar to deciding whether you’ll cut off your hand or your foot. Yet if one is infected, the amputation is certainly necessary.

2. Bad actors can turn good sentences into question marks.

3. Editing a movie is similar to using a hatchet to trim your fingernails. In other words, if you try to speed up, there will be some blood loss.

4. The public is picky. If you shoot for a particular emotion or feeling, that reaction may not be presently available in the audiences provided.

So many movies that planned on being A rated ended up sliding from their lofty goals, further confirming–perhaps without our knowledge or permission–whatever will B will B.

Donate ButtonThank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) —  J.R. Practix 

Jonathan’s Latest Book Release!

PoHymn: A Rustling in the Stagnant

Click here to get your copy now!

PoHymn cover jon

 

 

Absurd

by J. R. Practix

dictionary with letter AAbsurd: (adj.) wildly unreasonable, illogical or inappropriate

What a revelation!

One of the first screenplays I ever wrote was returned to me by a producer with a two-word comment: “Absolutely absurd.”

I did not take a moment to go and check the definition of the word at the time, so I took it as a compliment–that the writing in this project was wacky, filled with delightful whimsy. But reading the meaning today, I now realize that this gentleman meant me no good.

Of course, it sheds light on other occasions in my life when the word “absurd” has been applied to my behavior.

I remember asking the prettiest girl in the class to go with me to the prom in my junior year of high school. She gently patted my cheek and said, “That’s absurd.” And here I thought she meant I had a great sense of humor.

No, any way you look at it, “absurd” is not a compliment. It appears to be a way of communicating the sentiment “you suck” while maintaining a certain amount of decorum.

Of course, I can think of many things that I consider to be absurd. But the problem with pointing the “absurd gun” at others is that if you live a life capable of being viewed as out of the box, you are more susceptible to verbal retaliation.

I think I will just go out and try to be funny, enjoy my life and hope that nobody criticizes my particular jovial view.

Of course, this is America. Who could possibly curtail the joy of critique?

Now that’s absurd.