Dark Cloud

Dark cloud: (adj) dim, indistinct

It is a perennial favorite to feed a never-ending argument about the value—the realism—of dark entertainment.

One of my grandchildren says she doesn’t want to be known as a “goody two-shoes,” which has set her in motion to watch, read or peruse anything that clouds the mind with darkness.

I fuss with my children over this issue.

I’m just always curious about what I refer to as “the final day.”

I’m not speaking of eternity, or a “Great White Throne Judgment.”

I am referencing the sensations, the regrets, the wonder, the curiosity and the reflections that enter our minds and souls when and if we know we have twenty-four hours to live.

It is often the case that this cushion of preparation is not provided, and we go from breathing to breathless.

But assuming that we had a guaranteed twenty-four-hour period to consider our choices, would there be anyone who wished that he or she had spent more time in the dark clouds?

It may seem noble, or worse, intellectual, to commiserate with the insane or the hopelessly lost.

But what is it they teach us?

Are they a warning for the stupidity of foolish behavior?

Or do they encourage us to loosen up just a bit more, keeping an eye on not going too far?

Yet the human race always goes too far.

I do not need to be surrounded by butterflies.

But I need to at least observe caterpillars, knowing where they are headed.

Couth

Couth: (adj) showing or having good manners or sophistication

 I never get a chance to do anything couth because I’m too busy trying to correct my uncouth behavior.

I also think that we could make great advancements in our society and also in the human race simply by agreeing with each other about what truly is couth—and therefore being able to identify the patterns of action that would be uncouth.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

What would be the top five attributes of being couth with people of every culture, from every nation, every religion and every predilection?

1. Learn how to listen by making eye contact and at least imitating interest.

2. Lead with kindness, even if you expect it to be rejected.

3. Smile more, even when you’re not taking selfies.

4. Contribute your talent where it will help—not where you wish it will help.

5. Be grateful.

I offer these five to you today as the Couth of Truth.

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Copy

Copy: (v) to make a copy of; transcribe; reproduce:

My mother was totally convinced of it.

You could not change her mind.

She believed if I hung around with bad kids, I would copy their behavior.

It made me mad. I didn’t understand why she didn’t think they could hang around with me and copy my behavior.  Of course, the problem was, I always turned funny wisdom on words that begin with a C
up lame and proved her point.

Why is it so much easier to copy stupidity than intelligence?

Why are we able to Xerox a bad attitude instead of making copies of good ones?

It is because all of us are basically frightened that we’re missing out on something. If we do too many good things, then we’ll never know how much fun the bad ones could have been. So we continue to pursue errant behavior, hoping it will bring a thrill, and then suddenly, without warning, we face the consequences of our actions, and are shocked when we either find ourselves defiled or dead.

Why can’t we have people who pursue joy, goodness, praiseworthy activities and creativity, who are secure enough that they could sway the sinner instead of slipping from sainthood to mediocrity?

I don’t know.

But my mother always felt self-righteous about being accurate concerning me hanging out with questionable characters.

I probably should have told her that self-righteousness is also a sin.


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Conditional

Conditional: (adj) subject to one or more conditions or requirements being met

There are certain things you cannot do in America:

You cannot be mean to your puppy on Main Street.

You certainly cannot suggest that the red, white and blue color scheme of the flag clashes.

And you risk life and limb if you even whisper that the phrase “unconditional love” was invented in the office of a pop psychologist and immediately adopted by Hallmark Cards.

Any mortal who wears skin, pumps blood and allows that circulation to reach his or her brain, is fully aware that we need love to have some conditions.

When left to ourselves and told that we’re “fine the way we are”–that the affection offered in our direction is not contingent on some facets of our behavior–we become tyrants.

Especially comical is the notion that our Creator–God–would extend such a gift to His creation, considering that He is fully aware of both our heavenly potential funny wisdom on words that begin with a C
and our notorious naughtiness.

That is why the Good Book is full of “if and then’s.”

“If you do this, then you will get this…”

  • If you have faith, you can move mountains.
  • If you believe, you will be saved.
  • If you are generous, it will be measured back to you.
  • If you judge, it will be metered at you with the same intensity.

Though we want to convey the depth of our emotion and appreciation for one another, it is certainly devious to suggest that our human feelings are not conditional. If they were not conditional, we couldn’t be of help to one another.

After all, sometimes a certain amount of intervention is necessary to get our mate out of bed to go to work. At that point, he or she might insist that we do not love them. Nothing could be further from the truth.

We just know that if they go to work, we can go out to dinner on Friday night and actually afford an appetizer.

 

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Cocky

Cocky: (adj) conceited or arrogant

If we do not learn the definition of confidence and how it applies to everyday human life, we will continue to be inundated by arrogant thugs, who believe that acting cocky is being prepared.

Cocky is what I think about my ability.

Confidence is Earth weighing in.

I can tell you what I think I can do–but until opportunity comes along for me to prove my assertions, we are merely dealing with the “theory of delusion.”

To some degree I feel we deserve the leadership we get, for in order to give ourselves permission to over-promote, over-state and be cocky, we must allow those who rule over us to exhibit the same pattern of behavior.

Of course, as you will find, the higher you ascend in life’s positions, the more danger there is that your failure to fulfill your promises can be devastating, if not deadly.

In other words, if I say I’m going to clean out the gutters and do not achieve it, we have rainwater awkwardly falling off the roof. However, if Congress, or the President, say they’re going to follow up on a peace treaty and then fail to deliver, we have war.

And one of your loved ones comes home in a box.

May I suggest that we just do away with cocky? I’ve never seen a football team win a game simply because they out-bragged their opponent.

Matter of fact, inwardly we admire people who keep their goddamn mouths shut, have a twinkle in their eye, go into the arena and just flat-out conquer.

What makes us continue to believe that flapping our jaw and thumping our chest is the best preparation for the challenge?

So we end up with leaders, entertainers and even preachers who have more cock than walk.

 

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Boob Tube

Boob tube: (n) television or a television set.

You probably won’t believe me but his name was actually Uncle Bebo.Dictionary B

He was a small, elf-like man with a mischievous grin who used to love to tease me with various tricks and little lies he’d tell to produce astonishment, which brought him great levity when seeing my bewildered face.

I remember telling him one day that I liked Milky Way candy bars. The next time he came to see me, he brought me black licorice. He said, “If you like Milky Ways, you’re really going to like black licorice.”

To this day I don’t know whether he was joking with me or if he really thought that black licorice tasted like Milky Ways.

It doesn’t.

This is the same thing I feel about television. In an attempt to pulse the marketplace to become more realistic, the producers try to convince us that their exaggeration is reality. In other words, they pass off black licorice as Milky Ways.

I’m not so sure they mean harm, but I’m quite positive they do not understand that the purpose of art is to both evoke and invoke–evoke a response, but invoke more of the beautiful attributes of human behavior.

An evening of watching the boob tube makes me feel that the world is filled with boobs–idiots who think they achieve their purposes by resorting to violence.

Of course, this is ridiculous. The laws of our land forbid us from even laying a finger on another person without being accused of assault. But we are led to believe that revenge, getting even, cheating, lying, expressing great frustration and being childish are acceptable forms of behavior.

Television is not dangerous, it’s just irresponsible.

It is fully aware that we need Milky Ways, but for some reason it has over-purchased black licorice and is trying to get rid of it.

 

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Applaud

dictionary with letter A

Ap·plaud (v): to show approval or praise by clapping.

Although many people distinguish between human beings by referring to them as “saints” or “sinners,” I truthfully contend that we all blur into “sainners.” For after all, the saints do sin, and the sinners, every once in a while, stumble into some saintly behavior.

But there is one distinct difference between those who “pew” and those who have “de-pewed” and that is over the issue of whether to applaud or not to applaud.

Those who have refrained from steeple life deem applause a way of showing appreciation and often those within the confines of the holy temple think that such generosity is reserved solely for the Almighty and not for his faithful minions.

Here’s the problem: whether you are in the church or out of the church, you’re still human.

Since saints appear to be those individuals who have escaped the mortal coil and no longer have to worry about rent and traffic gridlock, it is difficult for us to pattern our lives after their mannerisms.

Saints and sinners both have to find a way to be human without offending one another (or God, for that matter).

And I will tell you, one of the sure ways to create a resentful, frustrated and bitter individual is to remove encouragement and approval for his or her work.

In America, we show that kind of “attaboy” with money or applause.

When you remove the applause, as is often done in religious circles, and even occasionally subtracting the money, you end up with a craftsman who is trying to do his work out of duty.

Can I say–human beings just suck at duty? Or maybe it’s just that duty itself sucks.

So even though I have performed in front of the faithful many times, I gently demand that they applaud so they don’t end up looking like a bunch of jerks who are trying to decide whether to enjoy themselves.

Matter of fact, because I know the God who fills my heart is a creative genius, I sometimes will step outside early in the morning, as the sun is rising, smile … and applaud.

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