Tag Archives: intelligence

Declutter

Declutter: (v) to remove mess or clutter from a place.

All the power in life lies in discovering worthy definitions.

Therefore, what is declutter?

If we can’t come to terms on the definition of something, then each person can develop his or her rendition of the word—until we end up fighting over it.

For instance, the word “slavery,” circa 1855, did not have the same meaning in Boston that it did in Atlanta. Arriving at common ground is how we move forward to make quality decisions.

So in determining what clutter is, we must realize that we can either evaluate it by worth, sentiment or value.

If we do it by worth, we’re going to start chatting about money.

Sentimentality will bring in deep-rooted feelings.

But value, on the other hand, is very simple:

If I haven’t used this in the past six months, I don’t have any need for it.

There are obvious contradictions. For instance, a pair of skis. If I found the in my garage in July, I would think they were useless. But come January, they can be a treasure.

Yet most of the time, if the object in question is an item for all seasons, if we have not used it in six calendar months, it probably is ready to skedaddle. It has gone from being a gift to an experience to a failure—ending as clutter.

Just consider if we had the intelligence to take all our failures, box them up…

 And ship them off.

 

Death

Death: (n) the act of dying; the end of life

Pwanged with a silly stick of maudlin muddling, I will occasionally imagine what the world will be like right after my demise.

That being my death.

When doing so, my eyes quickly fill with tears over how sad I presume others will be over my absence.

And then, without warning, my brain suddenly rights itself, and I realize the past five people I know who have died were afforded about one week of concentrated bereavement.

And then life, wearing very heavy boots, marched on.

I don’t know how it should be.

I don’t know what the correct length of time is to commemorate and memorialize the deeds of another traveler who is leaving because of the absence of breathing possibilities.

But it should be different.

Shouldn’t it?

Even people we regale as “planet changing souls for the ages” only get thirty seconds of silent reflection prior to the opening of Wall Street.

Thirty seconds? Really?

I, of course, understand that there will be spasms of dismay for a length of time over the departure of a fine friend—hopefully including me.

But the audacity of the human race—to think it has the energy and intelligence to proceed without me—is a worrisome, if not tearful, conclusion.

I don’t know what to do about that.

But after careful consideration and pausing to ponder over possibilities, I have decided that my best approach is to get even…

…and stay alive.

Cum Laude

Cum laude: (adv) with honor

The pressure to be pressured.

It is prevalent among human beings.

We are little satisfied with satisfaction.

We seem to be possessed with the need to be superior.

It apparently does not help that we are heads and beaks above the animal kingdom in intelligence. No, there is a gnawing desire to be dominant at everything—to be acknowledged as the winner.

So in the educational system they came up with cum laude. This means you graduated just a little higher than the average, and there are no noticeable mars on your record.

At the moment of graduation, every cum laude would like to be at least a summa cum laude. The problem with being summa is that it’s not magna.

No one tries to be summa cum laude—second place.

No one has it as a goal.

They’re shooting for magna cum laude and fall short.

But they’re just a “nose-in-the-air” better—so they require a category to distinguish them from being a mere cum laude.

When the work life begins and the cum laude, summa cum laude and magna cum laude arrive at the company, park their cars and walk in at 9:01 A. M., the grades or the courses that decided the varying degrees of recognition vanish. Now they have to live off their common sense and their kindness.

Yet the human race thinks it really is—a race, that is.

We want someone, somewhere to know in some way that we were a magna instead of a summa, or at least became a cum—not just ending up a “laude-mouth.”

funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

Cryptic

Cryptic: (adj) mysterious in meaning; puzzling; ambiguous

Some examples of cryptic thoughts.

It certainly was fortunate that there were ignorant black people in Africa so that American slavery could prosper.

President Trump would be a fabulous leader if he knew where he was going.

It is ironic that the Jews would consider it anti-Semitic to be blamed for the crucifixion of Jesus, even though their Council cast the votes.

Men and women are equally talented and intelligent—and there the equality ceases.

I shot an arrow into the air and I sure as hell hope it didn’t kill anybody.

I am happiest when I know some people are sad because there seems to be a limited amount of happiness.

The best Republican President acted like he was a Democrat.

The best Democrat President was probably a secret Republican.

People don’t seem to be able to just enjoy sex without thinking they are the best at it.

The more we envy others, the less the chance of ever possessing what they have.

Religion is about as close to God as politics is to freedom.

You can always tell when a nation is failing—it attacks its poets.

I blame myself for trusting you to have the intelligence to make the decision that has now ruined us both.

These are some examples of cryptic statements.

Such talk is fun.

Such talk is clever.

Such talk can start wars.

 

funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

https://jonathanrichardcring.substack.com/

Copy

Copy: (v) to make a copy of; transcribe; reproduce:

My mother was totally convinced of it.

You could not change her mind.

She believed if I hung around with bad kids, I would copy their behavior.

It made me mad. I didn’t understand why she didn’t think they could hang around with me and copy my behavior.  Of course, the problem was, I always turned funny wisdom on words that begin with a C
up lame and proved her point.

Why is it so much easier to copy stupidity than intelligence?

Why are we able to Xerox a bad attitude instead of making copies of good ones?

It is because all of us are basically frightened that we’re missing out on something. If we do too many good things, then we’ll never know how much fun the bad ones could have been. So we continue to pursue errant behavior, hoping it will bring a thrill, and then suddenly, without warning, we face the consequences of our actions, and are shocked when we either find ourselves defiled or dead.

Why can’t we have people who pursue joy, goodness, praiseworthy activities and creativity, who are secure enough that they could sway the sinner instead of slipping from sainthood to mediocrity?

I don’t know.

But my mother always felt self-righteous about being accurate concerning me hanging out with questionable characters.

I probably should have told her that self-righteousness is also a sin.


Donate Button

Subscribe to Jonathan’s Weekly Podcast

Good News and Better News

 

Copious

Copious: (adj) large in quantity

Memorable.

What is memorable about us?

It’s going to be something large—because after all, the human race is just a bunch of children with jobs and credit.

We’re impressed by big.

We remember things that stand out.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

We file away, in our minds, that which is huge and obvious.

What is copious about me? Normally the word describes the amount of notes someone takes on a subject (although I’m not quite sure what copious notes are since what we really need are sufficient notes).

But…

I am copiously overweight.

I am copiously bald (though no one would actually say that.)

Copious is a word that exists but is ignored because we don’t want to appear that we’re judging things by how immense they seem.

Each of us has a copious personality. It is the part of us that juts out long before we have the chance to contradict it with our intelligence.

What can we do to avoid the more copious parts of ourselves, overwhelming the message we want to convey to those around us?

Although we hope that grace and mercy will get us through the tough times, we must understand that the only thing we can do to create copious evidence of who we are is to push forth our good works—or our bad works. Ultimately, we will be known by what we considered important enough to do.

Therefore, I shall work on being copiously generous, copiously kind and copiously creative.

Who knows? Maybe someone will notice instead of staring at my belly fat.


Donate Button

Subscribe to Jonathan’s Weekly Podcast

Good News and Better News

 

Component

Component: (n) a part or element of a larger whole

Bob thinks intelligence is the key. So he studies, but ends up being overbearing with his opinions. Therefore no one can stand him.

Reverend Thompson contends that prayer is the answer but generally speaking is so busy holding seminars on the issue that he misses manyfunny wisdom on words that begin with a C phone calls from those in need.

The man running for Congress insists that political maneuvering is the essential component for a successful run for office, but then discovers there is a lot of lying that accompanies such choreography.

The women’s rights organization feels it is necessary to diminish the role of men in order to gain air for their cause, and after all the arguments are done, they are quietly and privately referred to as “bitches” behind their backs.

On the other hand, the chauvinists are darned tootin’ certain that if we could get back to the “nuclear family,” everything would be all right, as they lead their nervous wives and frightened children into the next over-planned activity.

Everybody thinks they have the component to make our society run more smoothly. Even though I see great worth in many of these efforts, I have found that the best piece to bring to the puzzle–the component that always seems to be needed for any occasion–is a simple splash and dousing of good cheer.

 

Donate Button

Subscribe to Jonathan’s Weekly Podcast

Good News and Better News

 

Comply

Comply: (v) to act in accordance with a wish or command

There are two ideas that are dangerous.

  1. Drugs can be taken in moderation
  2. If it’s not my idea, I don’t like it as well.

Both of these assertions cause the human race to look like a barrel of monkeys placed in a dark warehouse, given five minutes to escape.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

We were never meant to be frantic. Self-centered and unaware are two of the better ways to come across shredded and dismembered.

For after all, someone who will drink one glass of wine will easily begin to drink three without knowing when he or she moved to two. Just the facts.

And if you insist on following only the ideas that crop up in your mind, this limited experience will leave you jealous of those who are willing to comply, taking on the wisdom of friends and neighbors.

I comply.

I cannot tell you that I’ve always been one who complied, but the more I realized that my willpower is nonexistent and my intelligence does have fences and boundaries, the sooner I got to partake of the joys of sobriety and the blessings of being linked with great notions.

 

Donate Button

Subscribe to Jonathan’s Weekly Podcast

Good News and Better News

 

Complex

Complex: (n) consisting of many different and connected parts

America has a new favorite word.

It is “complex”

When we have no solutions, ideas or even desire to pursue quality, we like to declare the situation complex.

That means it will take a long time, many meetings and millions of dollars to study–and still there are no guarantees that a solution will be devised.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

It is an adult assertion that life itself is complicated, and therefore we prove our worth and intelligence by furrowing our brow, appearing bewildered and going into the process of deep scrutiny.

So when subjects like race, religion, politics, gender bias, sexuality or even the price of beefsteak come up in conversation, it is very important that all the people in the room agree that these matters are very complex, and therefore require oodles of time for discovery.

And God forgive you if you suggest that something might be simple.

Because even if it isn’t quickly solved–even if the contention that a matter is complex does play out–we are still much better people when we simplify.

 

Donate Button

Subscribe to Jonathan’s Weekly Podcast

Good News and Better News

 

Compare

Compare: (v) to estimate, measure, or note the similarity or dissimilarity between.

During a very brief stint of working in the motelier industry, I ran across a gentleman who owned an establishment, and took me on a journey of his array of available rooms.

Every time he entered one of the bathrooms, he took a deep, long, sniffing breath. I decided to ask him what he was trying to smell.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

He turned to me sternly, peering into my eyes, and said, “The beginnings of mold.”

Yes, this fellow was completely convinced that long before the mold showed up in the bathroom tile, it could be sniffed out, tracked down and destroyed.

I had no reason to argue with the man–even if he was wrong, a good dousing of the tiles in bleach every once in a while is a capital idea.

But I must be honest with you–even though I can’t tell mold from gold, I do have a nose for the beginnings of bigotry.

And long before it becomes prejudice which has lost control, it pops its little head up with the word “compare.”

As human beings, once we allow ourselves to compare what we do to what other people do, it is safe to say that we will rarely consider their approach to be better than ours.

So in attempting to establish our refinement–or should the word be “superiority?”–we somehow or another have to sully or taint other renditions.

As people sit on panels and compare one race to another, one country to another, one gender to another or one religion to another, they feel so goddamn intelligent–never realizing they often have the sniff of social mold.

 

Donate Button

Subscribe to Jonathan’s Weekly Podcast

Good News and Better News