Tag Archives: swimsuit

Courtly

Courtly: (adj) very polite or refined, as befitting a royal court.

Avoiding hassle.

Even though I understand that hassle is often what challenges our intelligence and helps us grow, it is certainly natural to try to elude it.

One of the primary ways to do this is to plant, deep within your consciousness, the understanding that everybody in the world has an opinion on how they think they should be treated—and if your approach varies from that, you are opening the door to hassle.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

There are so many social movements discussing how men and women should treat each other, or what is considered racially insensitive, that it is time for forward-thinking people to develop a lifestyle that is purposely innocuous, to aid us in dodging conflict.

Cases in point:

Some people appreciate honesty while other people want you to lie to them profusely (especially when it comes to evaluating their appearance or deeds).

There are those who want to be encouraged, and some who require critique.

And we certainly are aware that some travelers are more emotionally sensitive than others.

I will tell you—the only safe profile is to be courtly.

Yes, if you give the same respect to every fellow-shopper at Wal-Mart that you would offer if you were in Buckingham Palace with the Queen of England, you will pretty well guarantee never offending a human being with your profile.

So, if you walk in front of someone, say “Excuse me.”

If you bump into them, remind them of how clumsy you are.

If both of you come to the checkout line at the same time, let them go first.

And if they ask you how they look in their new swimsuit, defer to someone else who has superior wisdom on fashion.

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Cellulite

Cellulite: (n) persistent subcutaneous fat causing dimpling of the skin

If it’s got your thoughts, it’s got your soul.

I just find this to be true.

What corrals my attention, stimulates my brain and makes me contemplate pretty much sets the agenda for my entire human experience.

With that in mind, I am very careful not to focus on anything that has to do with the flesh and pretend that it has any worthy emotional or spiritual implications.

Women have cellulite. Men have cellulite. You can feel free to attempt some simple exercise or treatment to get rid of it.

But if you find yourself going on a trip to the beach wearing sweat pants, talking to everyone on the journey about your cellulite, frightened to death to expose your legs, then you’re in the middle of what I would refer to as a “self damnation.” Simply defined, this is a curse each one of us places on ourselves to forbid us from heavenly conclusions because of our hellish fear or lack.

At no time whatsoever during a romantic encounter does it matter one little bit if a man or woman has cellulite. It only matters if you’re watching them from a distance, determining whether they would be worthy of such intimacy.

But you must understand that anyone who has worked hard enough to not have cellulite may just be as demanding of the partner they select.

 

 

 

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Bikini

Bikini: (n) a very brief two-piece swimsuit for women.

Dictionary B

I grew up in a time when seeing a woman in a bikini at the swimming pool was like looking at pornography.

Since we didn’t have dirty pictures on the Internet, the only time there was an opportunity to view partially exposed breasts and the majority of a female torso was at the local pool.

When bikinis became popular, girls immediately started wearing them because they thought they were “cute.”

I think deep in their consciousness, these young ladies were aware that they were torturing the boys by displaying the fruits of the flesh without offering them a chance to take a bite.

I vividly recall the first time I saw a girl in a bikini. I spontaneously had an orgasm. It wasn’t planned. It’s probably not something I should even share. But I do so because it always reminds me of the sense of humor our Creator had in constructing human beings–and also our timetable.

At the moment in life when we have the most sexual prowess, we also have the least control. And later on, when viewing a bikini is still pleasurable but no longer eruptive, our plumbing seems to be a bit clogged.

I am sure the heavens find this to be hilarious. I know God must be a gentle trickster–because He does fool us into believing that we are much more powerful than we actually are.

And then, when we scatter our efforts and end up with futility, He is there as a kindly Father, to retrieve our egos and allow us to live another day.

I will always like bikinis, but there is nothing at all as powerful and poignant as the first one I viewed at the local swimming hole…when I practically lost my head.

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Thank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) —  J.R. Practix