Bulldog: (n) a dog of a sturdy smooth-haired breed with a large head and powerful protruding lower jaw
It was a bulldog named Polka.
One of my sons and his family purchased this old, brutish mutt, compelled by an inner need to display a dog which is obviously suffering from image issues and a variety of afflictions. She snorted, she slobbered and she found it very difficult to get around, spending a lot of her time panting.
So obviously, I felt an immediate affinity to her.
She apparently liked me, too–because every time I arrived at the house, she perched herself at the front door and wiggled her butt the best she could, while simultaneously peeing on the floor.
I can’t say it was the best greeting I ever had, but certainly the most sincere.
Bulldogs are known for having a difficult time acquiring air through their distorted snouts. So one day, in the midst of an extraordinarily hot, Florida afternoon, Polka exerted herself so much that she came home and died.
Even though, as time has passed, another bulldog named Oscar has been purchased to replace our long-lost friend, I will never forget her.
For I have never found anyone else to urinate in reverence to me.