Tag Archives: clam

Clam

Clam: (n) a marine bivalve mollusk with shells of equal size.

I guess any decent mollusk would consider it a home invasion. After all, you have this perfectly wonderful shell, which should be impenetrable.

So someone comes along, boils your ass, insults you by throwing in spices because you have no flavor of your own, and then takes a knife to crack you open to
steal your life force.

Pretty much of a horror story if you live in the ocean.

I have eaten clams many times. Perhaps I should apologize. I’ve even taken one of those pointy objects they offer you to crack them open, making me feel like I’m some sort of “sea-farin’ man.”

I have two opinions on clams:

  1. They’re too small
  2. They have no flavor unless you dip them in a sauce.

So would I get the same sensation if I took a piece of bread and dipped it into an excellent cocktail sauce as if I dunked a clam in the same sauce?

I think so.

So let me review: for some reason we decide to invade the privacy of a reclusive creature who has clammed up, boil it to death, break open its shell and eat it, even though we know it’s not particularly satisfying.

Vindictive sons-of-a-bitches.

 

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Beleaguered

Beleaguered: (v) beset with difficulties.

Dictionary B

In the midst of the howling horde of hooligans who are posturing for political prowess, two beleaguered words faithfully try to tempt and tantalize, while teaching us.

Honest and calm.

Honesty has been given so much disregard that it almost seems relegated to the naivete or those who have made some sort of holy vow of promise.

However, honest is really just a truthful representation of the facts as we know them.

Calm, on the other hand, has been equated with meek–weak–which has been linked with the word “freak.”

Yes, we consider it to be anti-human to remain gentle and relaxed in the presence of a world of tribulation.

Honest and calm, two beleaguered but necessary attributes, continue to linger in the lobby of life, hoping someone will come up and strike up a conversation.

“Hello, Honest. How are you today? Are things working out? You appear lonely. You seem like you’re going to give up on your mission of honoring the truth.”

“Greetings, Calm. What’s it like trying to stay mellow in a world of rage? Do you feel useless? Do you wish you could just change a letter and become a clam? Of course, then they would say you’re ‘clamming up.'”

It is time for us to welcome back honest and calm.

Without them, we doubt the integrity of each other … and are always prepared to attack.

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