Anorgasmic: (n) an inability to achieve orgasm despite responding to sexual stimulation.
I found myself in the position where it was necessary, or at least presumed to be, to teach a class on human sexuality to a group of adults. (I clarify that they were adults, because once we started talking about sex, they actually turned into a bunch of giggling teens.)
Considering that sex is so important to our well-being and self-worth, we actually have an extremely flippant attitude about the subject. I will grant you, it’s not necessary to become intellectual in the discussion, but certainly, if we don’t get beyond whispering, smirking and leering, we will never understand how we are meant to co-exist, procreate and satisfy one another.
I think the greatest mistake is the assumption that men enjoy sex and women tolerate it.
Here is a simple fact: No one avoids anything that pleasures them. I have run across people who were either bored or dissatisfied with adventures that promised pleasure and only delivered a modicum of the proposed package.
It’s like going on a vacation and staying at a hotel, hoping to sun-bathe, only to discover that the swimming pool has been closed for repairs. No matter how much you try to make the local restaurants and shops interesting, the original goal taunts you.
Even though we consider ourselves to have a high-falutin’ society, our approach to sexuality lands somewhere between Neanderthal and Bedouin.
Basically, we believe that men are to be pleasured and women are to provide the pleasure.
Once I was able to convince my class to stop snorting and chuckling, we discovered that human sexuality is meant to be a mutual effort made by two people to achieve orgasm–no matter what it takes.
The ideal circumstance is to make sure that the female acquires pleasure. Then the male doesn’t have to feel the need to perform, but instead, can relish the interchange.
- Yes, women would be much more interested in sex if they were having orgasms.
- Men would have to spend much less time wooing them if they were trained in how to assist a woman in finding her own space and time.
But to do this, we must admit that men and women are more similar to each other than different … and we just might be one or two generations away from that conclusion.
Thank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) — J.R. Practix