Dalliance

Dalliance: (n) amorous toying; flirtation.

I was there for the death of dalliance.

It was recent, so you may have also been around.

For years and years, I fed my ego, enhanced my library of imagination for masturbation and granted myself a bit of prideful chest-thumping over the glory and beauty of flirtation.

It was very common at one time.

There was only one restriction—you needed to make sure that it was a mutual interaction. In other words, if you were joking around with a woman, as long as she was firing back her “blurt of flirt,” it was absolutely acceptable, invigorating, and released some of the pressure that often occurs in life over the attempt to suppress sexuality.

Granted, if dalliance was occurring from only one person, and the other individual was heading for cover as if there were bullets in the air, then it was certainly harassment and wrong-headed.

But for centuries, men and women have enjoyed teasing one another with false claims, silly innuendos and batting eyes, with stomachs held in and shoulders thrown back.

Then one day it all changed.

We began to believe that even if both parties were participating, it was possible that they were doing so because they feared for their job or they were so frightened by the circumstances that they remained mute, without objection.

I don’t know whether a woman on the job who is flirted with by her boss and returns some of the banter can then claim she was “too scared” to object.

I think we must decide if men and women are equals, or if they’re only equal when we’re talking about job opportunity and pay scale.

Are they equal in their responsibility to speak up for themselves and express their displeasure if they’re being made uncomfortable?

I don’t know how successful we’re going to be if we’re trying to make one person the conscience for two.

In other words, that aforementioned boss should realize the possibility that the employee is too terrified because of the fear of losing her job—so he should not generate any questionable approaches whatsoever.

The human race has survived in a splendid way, riding the wave of dalliance.

I just don’t know who we become if we can’t flirt with each other.

Can we maintain our self-worth if someone isn’t letting us know they think we’re attractive, clever and worth a back-and-forth repartee?

Sexual harassment is a bad thing.

But when does flirtation become sexual harassment?

It is the contention of this author that if an objection is not raised, a door remains open.

Best Man

Best man: (n) a male friend chosen by a bridegroom to assist him at his wedding.

Dictionary B

The danger of being candid is that after you spill your guts, you risk that others around you will insist they never feel the way you do, and are even appalled at your inclinations.

With that in mind, I will present a theory in this essay which you can feel free to deny, but if there is a lick of truth in it, do so at your own soul’s peril.

It’s fun to be a best man.

And the greatest fun about being a best man is having the ability to flirt with the bride without having to follow up with consummation.

Matter of fact, I will tell you that the greatest responsibility a man has is taking simple flirtation through the course of dating, ending up with commitment, and then having to deliver the full impact of all the promises.

Flirtation is marvelous.

Both parties feel invigorated by it and there is a sexual rendezvous in the mind which doesn’t have to be acted out, ending in disappointment.

In other words, brain sex is always great.

So I think many guys like to be the best man because they believe that often, in the mind of the bride, they are the best man … and she’s just settling for the other guy. 

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