Crone

Crone: (n) a withered, witchlike old woman.

An obsession with attributing certain characteristics to either the male or the female is one of the surest ways to showcase misogyny.

It’s not bad enough that we believe that women like gardening and nurturing things, whereas men are hunters and gatherers. The fact that there are thousands—perhaps millions—of examples to the contrary does not seem to deter people from “genderizing” activities.

For instance, for years hurricanes were designated by only using women’s names because “they’re so unpredictable.”

Of course, we grew out of this because we know that men are just as unpredictable as women.

But when it comes to the word “crone,” we are pretty sure that such a disfigured, frustrated, bitchy and aggravated person could only have breasts and a vagina.

Fascinating, huh?

After all, we’ve never seen old men who are nasty, backbiting gossipers, who can’t find a good word to say about anything.

Although Charles Dickens did give us that great crone with Ebenezer Scrooge.

Do you think it would have been even more popular if it had been Abigail Scrooge?

Then we could have eased the common misconception of the masses—that vitriol is normally passed along by the chicks.

funny wisdom on words that begin with a C


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Convenient

Convenient: (adj) at hand; easily accessible:

Although in the annals of literary history, he is considered to be one of the greatest villains of all time, Ebenezer Scrooge has a classic response to Bob Cratchit when his worker asks if it’s convenient to take Christmas Day off. In all candor, Scrooge spits back, “No, it’s not convenient to pick a man’s pocket.”

I, for one, have tip-toed my way around friends and family for years when asked if something was convenient or not, fearing I would come funny wisdom on words that begin with a Cacross Scrooge-like if I voiced my real opinion.

So this morning I will tell you five things that are not convenient:

  1. It is never convenient to be lied to, even if an apology follows. Mistrust lingers.
  2. It is never convenient for someone else to make an appointment for you simply because he or she thought it was “in your best interest.”
  3. It is not convenient to assume that as a Grandpa, you will attend every event at the school pertaining to your grandchildren, just because “you better, or you suck.”
  4. It is not convenient for the restaurant to run out of straws and napkins, but “they hope you’ll understand.”
  5. And finally, it is not convenient to be honked at in traffic simply because someone views him or herself as an aggressive driver on the way to an important meeting.

I shall add a sixth:

It is not convenient to listen to talking heads on television tell us that politicians just naturally run by different rules than us normal human beings.


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Attribute

Attribute: (n) a quality or feature regarded as a characteristic or inherent part of someone or something.dictionary with letter A

Marley had been dead for 7 years, and the only two things said about him came from Ebenezer Scrooge, who proclaimed him “a good man of business,” and others, who surmised that he was a cheap son-of-a-bitch.

Even though I recognize the value of leaving behind a history of my thoughts and feelings by writing and creating, in 30 years I will be judged by a single attribute.

What did I do to make other people’s lives easier?

That’s it.

If you’re of the mindset which contends that you’re on the planet to defend righteousness, or on the other side of the scales, to “eat, drink and be merry,” you may be sadly disappointed by the legacy you leave behind–because forced righteousness makes humans miserable and a philosophy of open-ended vice creates its own vacuum of angst.

What have I done this week to make people’s lives simpler, more gentle–shoot–more possible?

Being grouchy, picky, anal, selfish, giggly, scatter-brained or invisible really are not attributes, but instead, human vices we wink at, assuming that the person tied to them is basically useless to us.

  • Are you finding problems and solving them or just discussing them, or perhaps making them worse?
  • Are you bringing good cheer to situations of tension, or a can of gasoline to a forest fire?
  • Are you believing for the best, or joining those who chase conspiracies, insisting they’re not theories?

For what will I be known?

When it’s all said and done, and clichés like “when it’s all said and done” have been abandoned, I will probably be known for the silliness I brought to others.

They might actually read some of my works because they desire to possess such a gypsy joy, but it will be my attribute of child-like appreciation which draws them to my compositions.

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