Copacetic

Copacetic: (adj) fine; completely satisfactory

Copacetic is a word used by people who have enough money to throw at their difficulties—so it may appear to outsiders that they are problem-free.

Actually, satisfaction is a myth and those who pursue it are soon frustrated, holding their last dollar tightly in their fists.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

The goal in life is not to find satisfaction, but rather, create it.

There are no circumstances on Planet Earth which come together to formulate the exact chemistry that will make you and I content. There is always a skunk in the mix, stinking up our plans, frustrating our endeavors and leaving us running out of the room screaming, to escape the stench.

We decide to be satisfied—not by compromising, but by truthfully learning the way things are, and instead of banging our heads against cement walls, creating doors to get through to the other side.

There’s an old saying which proclaims: “In whatsoever state I am, there I will be content.”

We smile at such optimism, as pessimism smothers our faith.

Nothing will ever be copacetic.

There are too many factors working at the same time, colliding into one another, creating surprising spin-offs.

What we can do is find what’s real, get our peace of mind and purposes achieved in that climate—and out-smart and out-last the cosmos.

 


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Cop

Cop: (slang) a police officer

When I was a kid, if you called a policeman a “cop,” you were corrected. You were made to feel like some sort of hoodlum who was trying to be overly cool, overly familiar and by grown-up standards, overly stupid.

Through the years, the constables and police force have adopted the name “cop.” They had a show called “Cops.”funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

The feelings about these peace-keepers vary from city to city, age group to age group and race to race.

What’s missing, I think, is the definition of what makes a good policeman or woman. Because any officer who is “badge heavy” is a cop by anybody’s standards. And by “badge heavy” I mean that they take their position much too seriously rather than focusing on their responsibility.

I want to see a police-person and not think of the word “cop,” or wonder if he or she is an ass. What tells me this is whether he or she appears to be eyeballing the surrounding world anticipating that most people are going to be criminals or if most people are going to be next-door neighbors.

I want a man or woman who is wearing a uniform and carrying a gun to use the wisdom of mercy as much as possible, short of endangering his or her life.

“Cop” is still not a great name for a policeman. It’s one of those things we’ve accepted because our world is too intent on being cool instead of respectful.

But it certainly will not hurt the police officers in this country to carry their badges a bit more lightly, and their respect for humanity with a deeper and heavier consciousness.


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Cooties

Cooties: (n) a louse, especially one affecting humans, as the body louse, head louse, or pubic louse.

I think cooties have been eradicated.

I’m not talking about the little bug—I’m speaking of the stigma that was placed upon very young girls by very young boys at a time in the funny wisdom on words that begin with a C
past when these fellows insisted that the lasses “had cooties.”

Matter of fact, as a young boy in the third grade, I was desperately trying to keep girls from touching me because their fingertips could transfer these cooties onto, or into, my body.

Of course, it was all purely sexual tension.

Every young dude secretly hoped that some soft hand would graze his back as he ran away, and that he would embrace that early sexual sensation of exhilaration.

But what really concerns me, since it is nearly completely impossible that some eight-year-old mind was aware of a louse called a “cootie,” that there apparently was some mother or father began this rumor, trying to keep their children romantically separated.

I don’t think any eight-year-old boy went to the dictionary and said to himself, “What makes a girl so different? Oh! Aha! Here it is! Cooties!”

After it was hatched, I can see how the rumor spread—similar to the varmints themselves.

But this nasty representation of the female of the human species certainly had to begin in the mind of some mama or papa, who thought it best for their offspring to remain asexual as long as feasible.

What a waste of time—considering that within a few short months, these boys and girls would be all over each other, even if there were cooties in play.


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Coot

Coot: (n) a foolish or crotchety person, especially one who is old

I have officially become old enough to become a coot. I’m not sure what age qualifies you, but age is certainly a factor.

There are other considerations:

Coots always talk about “how good things used to be.”

Coots tend to refer to society as using a “handbasket on their way to hell.”

Coots pine for a time when they were younger and full of energy.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

I honestly don’t feel any of that whatsoever.

Many of my growing-up years were filled with ignorance, prejudice, anger, self-righteousness and bloodshed in an unrighteous war. So I don’t yearn to go back—I just insist that there are two things the human race can’t live without, and we should cease deleting them from our browser.

Human beings must have empathy and self-deprecation. If you don’t like the idea of self-deprecation, then insert humility.

When we stop feeling empathy for the man or woman next to us, we become enemies to our own species, similar to a bee who plots with the flies to steal the honey.

And when we don’t produce adequate humility, the obnoxious odor that comes off our being chases people from the room.

I’m not an old coot.  I don’t care who you sleep with. I don’t care what your political party is. I don’t care what your faith or lack of faith might be.

But when you mess with empathy and humility, I will dig my heels in, because then you’re plotting the destruction of the human race—of which I am proudly a member.


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Coordinate

Coordinate: (v) to place or arrange in proper order or position.

“Where am I?”

I find that many people spend too much time trying to figure out, “Who am I?”

There is some childish notion that we can be separate from the rest of humankind without any regard for the flow of the times, and be able to maintain our autonomy without finding ourselves lonely and out of step.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

It is not 1955. We do not have television shows where men and women who are married have to sleep in separate beds. We are allowed to say the word “pregnant.” Chauvinism is no longer an acceptable behavior, or even one that can be winked at as just part of “human tribe banter.”

It is not 1974. We are no longer going to tolerate a President who breaks the law and tries to cover it up. (At least I hope not.)

It is not 1985. We are no longer promoting greed and believing that the AIDS virus is a punishment from God against the gay community.

“Where am I?” is a very important question. If I am not able to coordinate what I believe in some sort of harmony with the world around me, I will not only be ineffective, but can quickly gain the reputation for being bigoted and notorious.

While I am sure some people are frightened that we’re losing the moral fiber of our society, a decision was made millions and millions of years ago by a Creator—to imbue His creation with free will.

Free-will opens the door to evolution. Evolution invites change.

There is only one immutable fact: if we don’t love our neighbor as ourselves, we will always be out of step and out of time.

We must coordinate with the world around us.

To do so, we must honor where we are much more than who we are.


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Cooperstown

Cooperstown: (n) location of the Baseball Hall of Fame

Never was a big baseball fan.

The point should be made that I never was a little baseball fan.

But I admire baseball.

Baseball is a sport that I would have come up with to justify being involved in athletics without actually breaking a sweat very often.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

It offers the perfect balance of exercise: one minute of exertion for five minutes of sitting, standing, contemplating, waiting and practice-swinging the bat.

It’s genius.

It has all the other elements that other sports possess. I’m talking about uniforms, equipment, scoring, players, cheerleaders, hot dogs, peanuts and cracker jacks.

But if, for some reason, you forgot to show up for spring training, or your gym equipment broke down over the winter, you could still appear and participate in the game.

It truly is the Great American Pastime.

And for those who made it to Cooperstown, to the Hall of Fame, they have taught us well:

The best way to pass time is to do as little as possible.


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Cooperate

Cooperate: (v) to work or act together or jointly for a common purpose or benefit.

Life sent me a text.

It asked me if I had a few minutes to sit down and discuss some things. Normally I would have been responsive, but it was a busy day.

Sometimes I intend to return messages to people but then I get absorbed in happenings and my very, very good intentions are set to the side. These people are often offended. They don’t understand how much I really wanted to get back to them.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

So Life texted me again. This time the request came with four exclamation points. I hate it when people overuse punctuation on the Internet, don’t you? It’s so ignorant. Do they really think that’s going to get my attention?

So this time, I refused to respond on principle—surely it must be some sort of scam.

The following week Life texted me again, and insisted that something needed to be done very soon, or else.

I despise it when people threaten me. Don’t you? Because if you follow up, trying to find out what it’s about, you discover they just played you to get your attention.

Honest to God, if I chased every person warning me about something, or informing me about another thing, I wouldn’t get anything else done.

So I came up with an emoji which I sent back to life. A cute one. I think it was a creature sticking out its tongue.

That kind of summed up my feelings about Life’s interference in my daily activity—especially the pushiness I was feeling from the unwanted messages.

Then all of a sudden, I died.

I arrived at some sort of place that seemed to have an atmosphere, but was completely suspended in time. Standing there waiting for me was Life.

Not seeing anybody else to talk to, I stepped up to Life and said, “What happened? I was too young for this.”

Life looked at me smugly and said, “Did you get my texts?”

“Yes,” I replied, wondering what in the heck that had to do with anything under the sun.

Life took a deep breath. “I texted you because I wanted to let you know that several alarms had gone off in your body which you were ignoring, and you needed to go get yourself checked out.”

I frowned. “Why didn’t you tell me it was important?”

Life groaned, then spoke slowly. “You see, that’s the problem with human beings. You think anything that you don’t know about is an interference, never realizing that most problems can be avoided if you will just stop, listen, receive the message, and cooperate.”


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Coop

Coop: (n) an enclosure, cage, or pen

When you’re six years old, life boils down to magical castles, super heroes and fire-breathing dragons.

So when my dad took me out to the little farm we maintained (so we wouldn’t appear to be city folks living high on the hog in a village of fifteen hundred people) we went for a walk through the chicken coop.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

I was unimpressed.

It was not a magical castle, nor did I see much potential for a hero named Super Chicken and there were no fire-breathing dragons.

That is . . .

Until the next morning, when my dad came into the little farm cottage, ranting and raving about the fox which had slit the throats of three chickens.

Keep in mind—I was six years old and did not know what a fox was, nor had I ever seen a creature with its throat slit. All I knew was that this fox had figured out a way to burrow underneath the fence to get the chickens.

Not lacking creativity, I envisioned a creature in a black cape with huge eyes darting from side to side, who was able through mystical powers, to lower his body frame to ground level, to wiggle underneath wire, only to rise up again and run through the chicken coop with his black cape, placing some sort of elaborate necklace on the hens’ throats.

Obviously, this had nothing whatsoever to do with what my father described, and much later in life, when I realized what a fox was and how dangerous it was to have one loose in the henhouse, I grasped the literal comprehension of the situation.

But I want to tell you—my six-year-old rendition was so much better.


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Coon

Coon: (n) a raccoon

The only dog I’ve had in my adult life I picked up as a rescue and selected him because he was sitting quietly in the corner, not barking and biting at the other dogs around him.

Little did I know that the reason he was so contemplative was that he was very sick and dying. I spent the first two nights with him sitting on my shoulder, petting him and praying for him. (Some people would think it’s stupid to pray for dogs, but I have a similar humorous reaction to the term “vegan.”)funny wisdom on words that begin with a C
He was advertised as a “beagle mix.”

Much mix.

But one fellow saw him as I was walking him through the park and asked if he could purchase the animal—because he was very interested in owning a “coon dog.”

I was confused. The gentleman explained that what I had was an animal which had so much hound in him that the breeding would show up under certain circumstances in the pursuit of small wildlife.

I just shook my head in disbelief.

He asked permission to take the leash, and he walked my dog toward a small rabbit which was running around in the grass. My mutt stopped, froze like a statue, lifted his nose and stared at the little rabbit like he was offering it for consideration.

The man turned to me and said, “You see? What you got here is a coon hound.”

I laughed and replied, “Looks to me like he’s more of a pointer.”


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Cool

Cool: (adj) moderately cold; neither warm nor cold

You can tell you’re a hot-head because you sweat the small stuff. But the question remains, what must be done to make sure cooler heads prevail?

Here’s a clue: you can’t just have a cool head. Your whole persona has to be cool.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

People who are stringent, unforgiving or dogmatic will not suddenly wake up one morning and say, “You know, I need to be more forgiving.”

A cool head begins with cool feet—feet that aren’t afraid to walk the path of life, knowing that some detours and adjustment are inevitable.

It’s a good idea to have cool knees—that means when you find yourself knocked down to them, rather than melting in a pool of self-pity, you take a moment to pray before you rise again.

Certainly, cool hands are required for everyone, not just Luke—a sense that you will linger and care about people with your touch, instead of yank them, push them or strike them.

Cool eyes—looking for great possibility instead of darkness.

Cool ears—hearing the better parts of the conversation and discarding the ignorance.

Cool is when you know that being hot burns things up and being cold freezes progress. Yet, arriving lukewarm makes everybody want to vomit.

Cool is that temperature where human beings actually gain the capacity to tolerate one another.


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