Convulsion: (n) contortion of the body caused by violent, involuntary muscular contractions
“When you are weak, you are strong.”
This concept is roundly rejected in everyday humanity, because it sounds ridiculous. So we give it the greatest insult of all—we ignore it.
When one of my sons was hit and run by a car, the brain damage that occurred through the accident left him with occasional seizures. I will never forget the first time I saw my child, who was impaired and unable to communicate, lying on the bed in the grip of a convulsion.
He was so out of control. I mirrored his position.
I could not understand the worth of such ugliness and felt abandoned, desperate for some sort of purpose.
Yet I must tell you, I despised every deep thought offered to me to assuage my guilt or suggest divine guidance on the purpose of a little boy shaking and shuddering with no remedy.
I had to come to grips with me. After all, disappointment has two parts to it:
- Why in the hell did this happen?
- Why in the hell did this happen to me?
Each question has to be answered individually until some comprehension about human progress begins to settle into the fiber and DNA of our thinking.
When nothing happens, we remain the same.
When good things happen, we remain the same but arrogant.
When bad things happen, we can’t remain the same, and arrogance prohibits us from finding peace of mind.