Tag Archives: driving

Cross-road

Crossroad: (n) a road that crosses another road

I’m desperately trying to remember the formula. I’m sure it’s age-old—but one night I convinced myself that I came up with it on my own.

Having some time on my hands, I got in my car and started driving, attempting to get lost.

I wanted to see how much fun it would be to find my way back home. (This was long before GPS and also long before I had so much shit on my plate that I had free time.)

So I set off driving, tried to ignore the signs or the names of towns and made sporadic turns. Unfortunately, my internal GPS naturally had me drive in boxes, and eventually I ended up right back where I started.

So I put on my thinking cap (which, by the way, is much too large for the surface it serves) and I tried to figure out how to pull off getting lost without it becoming manipulative but also having a spontaneous feel to it.

I came up with a simple concept:

Drive one mile, turn right, drive another mile, turn left, another mile, turn left again.

Then drive another mile, turn right, and repeat the process.

After about forty-five minutes of this endeavor, I ended up not knowing where I was.

To discover what crossroad would take me back to my destination, I just kept turning left. Then I saw something I recognized, and in no time at all, I was back at home with people who recognized me.

Honestly, I do not know if this is an actual plan of action, or even if it’s worth this small essay.

All I know about crossroads is that they offer you another direction.

The power of this? If you’re tired of where you’re going, you have the option of getting lost for a while, until you can find yourself again.

funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

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Counterintuitive

Counterintuitive (adj) counter to what intuition would lead one to expect

Spirituality and practicality meet together in a holy ground called common sense.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

Common sense is the wisdom that is so obvious to each and every one of us, that as long as we’re not rebellious or being bratty, we can see the intuition and understand the next thing that needs to be done.

So what makes us become counterintuitive to common sense is either a lack of belief in spirituality or too much spirituality and not enough function in practicality.

Of course, there is the danger of being so practical that you don’t think anything can actually be spiritual.

We seem to be going through a phase. If I were trying to characterize the present of social thinking and parallel it to the years of our growing up time, I would say the whole world is acting like it’s sixteen years old. In other words, we all have permission to drive and put our lives in gear, but we don’t necessarily have the maturity to achieve it.

We need to come back to the better parts of ourselves and allow the spirituality that we believe in and the practicality we possess to mingle and become our new common sense.

It is certainly counterintuitive to think we’ll be able to make valuable decisions without having common sense.

And it is also counterintuitive to try to achieve common sense without a spiritual practicality.


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Compulsion

Compulsion: (n) forced to do something through an irresistible urge

At one time I had a compulsion to be noticed. Now I like to notice.

I had a compulsion to be sexy. Now I’m extremely grateful if anyone is willing to have sex with me.

Also, there was a great compulsion in me to have money. Now I like to high-five myself when I find a clever way to use leftovers.funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

I had a compulsion to be famous. Now it’s exciting to be well-thought-of.

I had a compulsion to yell at other people I felt were idiots daring to drive cars around me. Now I ignore my horn–we haven’t interacted for weeks.

I had a compulsion to be spiritual. Now I’m lavishing in the joy of being real.

I had a compulsion to see my children do well. I woke up and realized it’s their lives.

I had a compulsion to participate in politics. Now I pop some corn and watch it.

I had a compulsion to be thinner. Now I work on trying not to be fatter.

I had a compulsion to be healthy. Now I cross my fingers and thank God for His grace.

I had a compulsion to be compulsive. Now I’ve learned the victory, the peace of mind and the utter bliss of “taking no thought.”

 

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Billboard

Billboard: (n) a large outdoor board for displaying advertisements.

Dictionary B

I am gradually learning to be reluctant to assume that my common practices or inclinations are universal across our species.

It is a natural posture we tend to take when justifying our feelings to make ourselves a part of the mass instead of separated like the math nerd from high school who’s too skinny and has pimples.

So I will phrase it this way: I read billboards.

I don’t know why. Probably because driving on the highway, I am a prisoner to the miles. And even though I may be listening to the radio or having a great conversation, 5,280 feet, which makes up only one mile, can still be a long way.

So I’m grateful for the reading material along the side of the road which fortunately is set in a large enough font for me to discern.

I read ’em all.

So I’m not so sure that television advertising always works with me. I have heard many commercials on radio and never given them a second thought.

But I have often stopped at a Chinese buffet advertised on a billboard, which was only five miles ahead, finding myself more and more excited as I speeded toward it.

I’ve gotten good deals on motels.

I have occasionally found an inspirational message.

There are folks who consider billboards to be an eyesore, but I do not believe anyone can claim that they’re ineffective. In the course of a single day on an average freeway in America, tens of thousands of people pass by and at least have to glance up and see the promo.

It is very effective–at least with me.

And I don’t even think they’re ugly, even though the ones in Kentucky that say “Hell Is Real” may totally and completely disprove my assertion.

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Thank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) —  J.R. Practix 

 

Aerodynamic

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter A

Aerodynamics: (n.) the study of the properties of moving air and especially of the interaction between the air and solid bodies moving through it.

I came to a conclusion yesterday: it’s really good that people can’t fly.

Actually there was no great revelation yesterday. I pretty much knew this all along. It’s just that when I saw the word “aerodynamics,” it brought my gratitude to the forefront.

It’s wonderful that the Creator gave every creature some specific ability, making it superior in a unique way to its neighbor.

  • Snakes crawl on their bellies.
  • Porcupines have quills.
  • Sharks have big teeth.
  • Skunks have … well … aroma.
  • And birds can fly.

Can you imagine, with the human ego, how annoying, obnoxious and even dangerous we would be if we flew??

Let’s just start with driving. As precarious as it may be to travel the freeway with other motorists, if that action was occurring up in the sky, where you would not only have a fender-bender but a fall to the earth as also well you can see, the results could be quite lethal.

And then there’s the problem of aerodynamics and air-lift–that skinny people would have even MORE reason to brag and feel superior to fat folks like me because they could “get up to three thousand feet” instead of hovering at three hundred.

Yes, that would be horrible–to not only be able to buy clothes off the rack at will, but also to touch the stars because you have five percent body fat.

I suppose it’s dangerous enough that we have built machines to fly us through the air, which make us believe that we are supernatural, yet we do fall from the heavens enough to confirm that we truly are not gods.

Aerodynamics is a wonderful study, best conducted in analyzing birds, airplanes and rockets.

Thank God my irritating friend Larry, from high school, was not able to achieve such heights. It was bad enough with im when he was discussing how much iron he could pump in the weight room. I can’t even imagine what he would have been like if he could have taken off and flown high over my head … to spit on me below.