Tag Archives: criticism

Chamber

Chamber: (n) a private room, typically a bedroom.

I remember the first time I heard the Beach Boys sing the song, I cried.

“There’s a room that I can go to tell my secrets to,

In my room…”

Or my chamber.

It was always very important to have a space with a door that would close, so I could separate myself from my fears, insecurities and those beyond the room who
wanted to hurt me.

I thought they wanted to hurt me.

It was many years before I realized they were equally as frightened–just using their criticism of me to boost their false bravado.

That’s the source of all meanness.

After all, the Germans were defeated in World War I, humiliated in the peace treaty that followed, and set out to find a “chamber” for their cause–where they could prove they were better than those around them. It became a chamber of horrors.

Having a room is a good thing.

Using it to get your head on straight is even better.

Leaving it is wise.

 

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Cack

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Cack: (n) a talkative, gossiping person

I have a new favorite word!

Cack!

How perfect! Does that not describe every single gossiping soul that you have encountered in your life?

They cackle–like poultry. And this stimulated me to realize that there are three types:

There’s the duck cack:

This is the person who tears another individual’s character apart, under the guise of concern and prayerful wishes, ducking away from the responsibility of being a back-biting loser.

This is followed by the chicken cack:

“Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck” all day long, pecking at the integrity of others, only to turn chicken and deny their involvement when confronted. They’ll even tell you who started the rumor.

And finally, there’s the goose cack:

These are people who are so sure that they’re direct emissaries from the Lord God Almighty that they’ll take their long neck and beak and unapologetically stick it up your ass–goosing you.

After all, when you speak for the heavens, you’re certainly not concerned about earthly criticism.

Here’s the question:

Can I catch myself when I become a cack?

Can I keep myself from barnyard nonsense so I have the right to live in the house with other sensible human beings?

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Brilliant

j-r-practix-with-border-2

Brilliant: (adj): very bright and radiant.

In deference to my human weakness, I have certainly downgraded some things.Dictionary B

My needed fifteen minutes of aerobic workout every day is now about four-and-a-half minutes. I literally don’t have the heart to do more.

My 1,500-calorie-a-day diet is open to the idea of 2,000.

And my decision to keep better tabs on my overall health is desperately in need of an overhaul.

In like manner, I’ve begun to use the word “brilliant” a whole bunch. Matter of fact, it’s become my default term whenever I run across anyone who’s willing to venture an opinion and take the risk of the criticism of others, or the possibility of failure.

I understand that “brilliant” used to be reserved for concepts which had weathered the storm of practical application and had come out the other end fulfilling requiremernts. But honestly, it takes a lot of courage nowadays just to experiment instead of standing on the sideline sneering at those who do.

We’ve become a nation of “judgers,” quickly losing anything to evaluate because no one is willing to train to become a participant. If they do, we are so certain of our expertise that we riddle them with bullets of complaints, dragging their depressed egos into shallow graves for internment.

It has become brilliant just to be willing.

It is brilliant to believe things can be better

And it is most brilliant to be prepared to be part of the solution.

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Break

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Break: (v) to separate into pieces

“He’s waiting for his big break.”

I’ve heard those words stated over and over again in my presence as I have stood idly by, knowing how errant they are, but remaining silent so as not to rock the boat.Dictionary B

There is actually no such thing as a “big break.” What you have are little victories and tragedies that come into your life, which break you up, segregating true ability from ego.

If every person in America were immediately cast into the role of what they thought they were worthy of doing, we would have nuclear war before the end of the day. Our perceptions are twisted by greed and arrogance.

Most of us have no idea of what we’re capable of performing in the cauldron of difficulty–because that’s where talent thrives or dies. No one gets to use their capacity in a vacuum. It’s always under pressure, criticism, lack or even fear.

So to a certain degree, it is Mother Nature’s job to break us. That is the true definition of our “big break”–when we are finally cracked open and the poison is spilled out, so we can rummage through … to find any gold that remains.

 

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“Quite literally the best Christmas stories I have ever read.” — Arthur Holland, Shelby, North Carolina

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Belittle

Belittle: (v) to make someone or something seem unimportant.

Dictionary B

Those who belittle be “littler” than them belittled.

More and more as I age, in a season when conversation is salted with pepper, I realize that the absence of legitimate talent causes us to attack contributors out of a fear that we, ourselves, are nothing.

Even when I find myself being cynical, I realize it’s because I am jealous of those who have received attention, while my efforts have been relegated to the position of backstage storage.

We belittle because we be “littler.”

That’s the truth of the matter.

There isn’t a great idea ever hatched in the mind of a mortal that has not been forced to endure the ridicule of the ignorant.

It is why we suffer from a dearth of inspiration.

It’s not because the inspiration is unavailable. Those inspired lack the emotional armor to survive the gauntlet of the unrighteous condemners.

It is too bad that goodness is plagued by sensitivity–because for it to gain voice, it needs to escape temporary damnation.

I swear to myself that I will never belittle again. And then, because of my insecurity, I attack in order to protect my ego.

When it’s over, I feel bad.

But unfortunately, the moment has passed, and the chance to embrace beauty has been scared away … by my beast.

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Bash

Bash: (n) a heavy blow.Dictionary B

I have given it much consideration.

I have finally come to the conclusion that my level of contentment, joy and satisfaction is exactly paralleled by my amount of criticism, frustration and jealousy towards others.

In other words, if I like my life, why in the hell do I care about yours?

I’m not recommending indifference to need, but certainly, if I find myself rejoicing in my pursuits, why is it necessary for me to bash yours?

I contend that most people who pursue religion are angry at the unbeliever because they fear these heretics are having more fun.

I think Democrats secretly know that Republicans make some good points, and Republicans are certainly aware of the value of ideas within the Democratic Party.

We bash because we are discontented.

We attack because we want people to be as miserable as we are, and it appears that they have sidestepped our little rendition of purity without suffering consequences.

I have found that it is much easier to be excited and encouraging to the world around me as I find my place in this time.

Bashing is an arrow pointed at the misgiving and doubt that is in our own hearts.

Since I don’t want to be a ballerina, it therefore becomes unnecessary for me to make fun of them dancing on their toes.

Since I have no desire to be gay, I also have no inclination to mock their situation.

And since my faith is based on compassion and the pursuit of regeneration, I don’t necessarily feel compelled to sarcastically mock traditions I consider to be meaningless.

Yes, the only way to stop bashing is to ask yourself one single, valuable question:

Do I really like what I’m doing, or am I faking it?

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“The best Christmas stories I’ve ever read!”

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We need a good Christmas this year.

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Banter

Banter: (n) the playful and friendly exchange of teasing remarks.Dictionary B

I do not know whether you’ve heard yet, or discovered it in the obituary columns, but banter has died.

The silly, challenging, comical, poking fun and sometimes nearly flirting with degrading conversations that friends once had with each other have been murdered because the movement of social media has deteriorated our interaction to, “please like me–or I hate you.”

Here is a startling statement: every piece of critique or even criticism is not necessarily meant to be confrontational.

I sometimes find myself joking with strangers in a grocery store, only to discover that they become alarmed if I even connote that they are anything short of divine.

Here’s what I know for sure–repentance is impossible if you already think you’re God.

If all your ways are righteous in your own eyes, then you will fail to realize that your emotional soul may be desperately in dissaray or on the verge of disintegration.

Introspection is what the human race requires to survive and to make sure that we don’t kill each other off.

And the best way to allow for introspection is to permit banter, which is a “safe zone,” where suggestions or ideas for discussion can be hatched without blatantly or viciously attacking another person.

Yes, long before I tell you that I think you’re an ass, I could have relieved some pressure by asserting that “even a monkey could learn how to change the toilet paper roll.”

We think we become more civilized by saying the right thing all the time, when all we’ve done is set up a situation for saying what we really feel–at the wrong time.

  • I would much rather you would joke with me than insult me.
  • I would prefer that you would poke fun at my foolishness instead of gossiping about me behind my back.

Banter is the gentle comedy we use to steer our friends in a different direction, so we don’t have to intervene … and constantly send them to rehab. 

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“The best Christmas stories I’ve ever read!”

From the toy shop to the manger, an advent calendar of Christmas stories, beginning on November 30th and ending on Christmas morning.

We need a good Christmas this year.

Mr. Kringle’s Tales will help you make it so.

Buy today.

"Buy

 

 

 

Autocrat

Autocrat: (n) a ruler who has absolute power.dictionary with letter A

I enjoy attempting to understand, even though unfortunately, I feel the possibility for comprehension is sometimes snatched away from me by the ambiguity of our times.

Let’s see if I can piece this together:

  • It’s good to have friends. Am I right?
  • Friends are supposed to be friendly. Got it.
  • Friends should encourage us.
  • But friends are also intended to awaken us to our mistakes.

Yet we live in a time when friends dare not contradict us, or they become classified as “haters.”

For you see, in a quest to make everyone more self-confident, we’ve actually succeeded in insulating ourselves from any form of criticism or input that might improve our status. We therefore find ourselves on a bumpy road, incapable of achieving comfort or ease because we’re always bouncing up and down or tossing from side to side.

Yes, the word autocrat used to refer to some sort of dictator who lorded over an entire province of helpless victims. But now I must extend the definition to a mindset which causes too many of us to contend that we rule a domain which needs to be revered, but never scrutinized.

That domain is our personal ego.

So what has transpired in politics, with nation rising against nation and kingdom against kingdom, is now equally being acted out in individuals–building personal little forts of protection for their idiosyncracies, refusing to let anyone offer a counter-view.

Here’s a question I must ask myself: am I prepared to make choices which can be challenged, both for authenticity and practicality? In other words, am I truly sincere and do I understand the end results of my actions?

Without this kind of submission to the common good, we will end up with a planet of billions of little dictators declaring war on the latest person to cross their border without permission.

There are three things necessary to maintain a quality human life:

  1. I find what I want to do.
  2. I do it.
  3. I learn from the blow-back.

If there is no learning from what we do, merely a stubborn determination to continue to do that which is ridiculous, we will bring our earth to a crumbling mass of rubble … by simply refusing to admit our need for repentance.

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Audacious

Audacious: (adj) showing a willingness to take surprisingly bold risks.

dictionary with letter A

I am very curious exactly how many miles one would have to run with a stick before actually tripping, falling, having the pointed end of the stick lodging in the eye.

Yet we were led to believe that such careless running with loosely held wood would ultimately most certainly lead to blindness.

We were not raised to be risk-takers.

So rather than ending up with a generation of people who are careful planners, adept at common sense, we have an “earthful” of cautious, lazy folks who occasionally rebel by actually doing things that are dangerously risky.

If you continue to avoid activities which merely demand a certain amount of skill because you think they’re risky, you’ll eventually get fed up, go out and enter a jalopena-eating contest.

Somewhere along the line we have to teach our children that the pursuit of excellence does bump up against risky endeavors, but the power of planning and the presence of practice does enable us to run with a stick without gouging our eyeballs.

I have taken audacious risks all my life.

I will tell you this–simply writing a blog on the Internet is risky business. The possibility for obscurity, criticism or being stalked by a person with a manic disorder who doesn’t like to swallow pills is always prevalent.

But it will take some risks for us to avoid greater risks.

It will take the frightening thought of negotiation to keep us from negotiating another war.

It will take risky conversations about racism to eliminate dead young men in the street.

It will take brave souls insisting on the common humanity of men and women to bring about the true peaceful interaction which will prevent us from being constantly at each other’s throats.

What is worth the risk?

Any time we have the chance to advance the cause of peace, liberty and justice, it’s well worth getting up out of our easy chair and grabbing our baton (which is just a stick)… to start running. 

 

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Amateur

dictionary with letter A

Amateur: (n) a person who engages in a pursuit on an unpaid basis.

It’s a pretty good definition that Webster came up with.

Yet I can tell you that in my lifetime, I have performed my share of professional service to neither acclaim or remuneration.

Yes, there’s another aspect of being amateur. It’s pretty simple: a true professional is in search of his or her weaknesses, to perfect them in order to avoid both critique and lack. An amateur, on the other hand, is in search of praise in order to acquire grace for a multitude of weaknesses, pretending they don’t exist.

This is why amateurs get worse with rehearsal and professionals get better. For after all, to continue to practice is an admission that things need to improve–and if you’re unwilling to admit your mistakes, then such a maneuver seems meaningless, and perhaps mean-spirited.

For instance, I wish we did have professional politicians–for actually, the little boogers are all amateurs.

A professional would understand that a certain amount of resolve is necessary to pave the way for the ultimate discussion which will lend itself to a treaty designed to progress the cause, to avoid looking inept.

Amateur politicians come in believing they are perfect in their present condition, needing no improvement, and only manifest resolve with no understanding of the divine need for agreement.

The end result is that we have a very amateur country with amateur participants, amateur results and therefore we receive the due payment for an amateur.

What do I work on in order to be professional?

  1. I compare myself with people who are better than I am, and work to imitate their excellence.
  2. I never settle for good when great still looms in the distance.
  3. I alleviate criticism by doing my own evaluation, which is much more intense than that of my audience.
  4. I keep a sense of good cheer about transition. It is not only inevitable, but also necessary.

I will agree with Webster that normally when you have enough passion to get better at what you do, it makes people believe you’re worthy of payment.

But to get there, you have to be an amateur without dough, still doing a great show.