Tag Archives: jungle

Anaconda

dictionary with letter A

Anaconda: (n) a semiaquatic snake of the boa family that may grow to a great size, native to tropical South America.

You can see the problem immediately as you read the definition.

After all, the wording is that it may grow to a great size. It sets up the scenario of what we might refer to as “anaconda envy.”

Could there be anything worse than being a tiny anaconda? Especially if you found yourself in water, swimming with those who had been birthed in the blacker parts of the jungle?

I guess you could always claim that the water you were swimming in was chilly. But wouldn’t that shrink your brother’s size also? It must be difficult to be an anaconda who is just normal snake size.

Consider this: the definition did not establish a “normal”, so it is easy to assume that the humongous snakes around you are the average, and you were just born a “little worm.”

So I imagine there is some anaconda competition–snakes sitting around the jungle (well, I guess they don’t sit)–but slithering about, measuring themselves and snickering at their unfortunate friends who were not so blessed by genetics.

Yes, even though all of us, as humans, may be terrified to be in a locker room, surrounded by the misrepresentation of “all men being created equal,” it certainly must be more frustrating … to be the victim of anaconda envy.

 

 

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Anachronism

dictionary with letter A

Anachronism: (n) a thing that belongs in another period than the present, usually referring to old-fashioned.

One of the more rib-tickling moments in my recent life was when I overheard two seven-year-old kids discussing how Kraft macaroni and cheese dinners used to have better cheese–when they were younger.

It was both endearing and enlightening.

It made me realize that it is possible at any age to reflect back on a previous time, which you have convinced yourself contained more promise, power or purpose.

It got me thinking.

What are anachronisms? What makes something old-fashioned? Just because some individual promoting an agenda wants to claim that a particular attribute is old-fashioned doesn’t make it so, Joe.

Because the things I find to be anachronistic are the causes put forth in our society which have historically proven to be errant or stupid:

1. Drug addiction.

We may want to debate whether drugs should be a crime or a freedom, but it doesn’t change the fact that any time you suck in smoke, swallow a pill or ingest a fluid to change your mood, you’re admitting that you, personally, do not have the ability to be happy without props.

2. Cultural appreciation.

I know some people think it’s important for black children to learn black culture, Chinese children their particular rendition and Hispanic offspring to pay their respects to Cinco de Mayo, but candidly, it’s just another subtle form of racism. It’s a way of distinguishing differences in the human race which only pull us apart instead of joining us together.

3. An aversion to manners.

Yes, there are folks who insist that being a lady or a gentleman–courteous–is too up-tight or phony. What is phony is thinking that you can treat people like crap and not end up being considered a turd yourself.

4. And finally (at least for this list), there is an ongoing belief that there is a battle between God and science.

Matter of fact, we’re choosing up sides again.

If we really believe there’s a God, then His creation certainly instituted scientific fact and Earth’s physics. If there is no God, then we’d better cuddle up to science, because it’s our only chance.

So since I believe in both, I consider it intelligent to keep them friendly.

  • An anachronism is something from the past that we cling to.
  • Tradition is a practice that we continue because of reputation.

But wisdom is an anachronism that needs to become a tradition because it offers human beings a chance to overcome our jungle … and plant a new garden.

 

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Agoraphobia

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter AAgoraphobia: (n) extreme or irrational fear of crowded spaces or enclosed public places.

I think I have claustrophobia.

I didn’t used to–even though the brief time that I played football, I didn’t particularly care for pileups, where people would be on top of me.

But agoraphobia‘s different. Within the spectrum of being frightened of experiencing a lack of room and oxygen is also a fear of people. Matter of fact, we start it pretty young, don’t we?

  • We tell our children not to talk to strangers.
  • Within the first few years of their lives, we cloister them in an atmosphere with no more than five to seven people, making a trip to the grocery store seem like a perilous journey through the jungle.
  • We coddle our offspring and project our apprehension into them upon entering school–so much so that many of them do not recover from their agonizing trepidation of interacting with people their own age. They can become misfits.

I guess what concerns me is that a little bit of agoraphobia is inhabiting everybody in this country. Statistics tell me that about 34% of the people who walk down the street holding a phone are pretending they have a phone call, so as to not have to interact with others.

Not only is it annoying to text when other people are around, but it may leave you totally debilitated and vacant of the desire to be close.

I admit, it can be frightening to make eye contact with other humans, but the absence of that gesture of openness neither alleviates danger nor promotes congeniality.

There are probably people who suffer from this condition, but I do think we are changing the definition of the word “fellowship” in our society. It is now a keystroke on Facebook, with twenty-four characters expressing how handsome we think some child is or how pretty a new little dress may be. In fact, my oldest son told me that Facebook is the new church of America. He said it with certainty and a bit of resignation.

If it’s a church, I’m curious about where God is, where love is, where hope is and where faith can grow. Because to merely admire someone’s new bowling ball is not to strike up a new friendship.

I know I’ve veered off the subject a bit, and perhaps the condition of “agoraphobia” is a worthy topic for a writer and thinker much brighter than myself.

But I do believe we can avoid becoming frightened of each other by choice. To do so, we will have to come away from our computer screens, our smart phones and actually look into each other’s eyes again … and risk what we see.

Africa

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter A

 

Africa: the second-largest continent, a southward projection of the Old World land mass divided roughly in half by the equator and surrounded by sea except where the Isthmus of Suez joins it to Asia.

I am shocked.

I sat down to write a clever essay on today’s word, Africa. when I dug into my Middle-America, middle-class, middle-intelligent and middle-conscience mind,  all I was able to conjure were images which I must be honest and tell you, seem quite racist.

Because when I think of Africa, I think of missionaries, cannibals, lions, monkeys, tribal rituals, Apartheid, jungles, Serengeti, antelopes being chased and killed, and people with black skin talking with extremely articulate British accents.

I thought about trying to come up with something different, pretending that I am cultured and aware of modern Africa and the progress the people have made. Or tip my hat to the notion that Africa is the “mother land of the whole human race,” but I realized it would be phony, and I would just be another American trying to appear that I am free of prejudice, when the truth is that, contrary to that fact, the continent reminds me of Tarzan and Jane.

I do not think we become better people by hiding our iniquity.

I do not think that I can fool you into believing I am a cosmopolitan world traveler who is free of my Central Ohio upbringing, and still walk away with a pure soul.

Here’s what I WILL say about Africa: most of what I learned as a child about this magnificent continent had something to do with either the zoo or the Zulu.

No one took the time to teach me anything else.

So even though I am grown and people insist that I’m set in my ways, I am unsettled enough to accept this meager representation of a great history and people. So I apologize for my lacking by trying to increase. Now that I have been alerted to my limitation, I will attempt to expand my borders.

We will never know what Africa could truly be today because it was invaded, attacked and robbed of its citizenry by white people who thought they were better.

I am an ancestor of such folk. For this I apologize.

But the best way I can express my contrition is by continuing to learn instead of assume.

 

Aerie

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter A

Aerie: (n) the nest  of a bird of prey, esp. an eagle, typically built high in a tree or on a cliff.

Am I being too needy when I say that I take great comfort in the fact that an eagle is considered to be a rather regal creature, even though it is bald like me? (Of course, lacking feathers, an attractive beak, and not to mention, the ability to fly–at that point all similarities seem to cease.)

But there is something wonderfully intriguing and even mysterious about the eagle, soaring high into the mountain, nestling itself into a home far from the jungle and the maddening crowd.

There is something here to learn: I need an aerie–not to remove myself permanently from humanity as a grumbling objection to the insanity being proffered, but rather, a place where I can escape at times and get a little higher so I can see a little clearer and gain some perspective, instead of touting how wise I am, with the evidence of how cynical I’ve become.

  • What passes for philosophy nowadays are actually jaded observations from those who have embraced sarcasm and abandoned solution.
  • What is pushed forward as government is an exclusive club of politicians, who get together to advertise favored causes, which most importantly, contradict the views of their opponents.
  • And what is passed on as communion of spirituality is either a narrow-minded God who’s pissed off with mankind or some benevolent hippie juiced up on weed, who loves everybody, no matter how miserable they are.

Fly a little higher.

Find a place of seclusion every once in a while, where you can clear your head.

In so doing, you might be surprised, like the eagle, at how God will give you new ideas … and expand your bird brain.

Adam

Words from Dic(tionary)

by J. R. Practix

dictionary with letter A

Adam: (in the Bible) the first man. According to the Book of Genesis, Adam was created by God as the progenitor of the human race, and lived with Eve in the Garden of Eden.

Ape or dust? Darwin or Genesis?

This appears to be our choice.

Would I prefer to incorporate into my thinking that I am a highly evolved primate, who sometime back in my distant history became the offspring of a smart monkey, who decided to walk out from among the trees and mate with another smart monkey, who eventually, over generations, created smarter and smarter monkeys?

Or would I rather believe in fairy dust, formed by the hands of a Spirit which rules the universe, to create the flesh and blood of a human being, completely intact, needing no evolution, and arriving on the scene adult, intelligent and whole?

Wow.

So here’s what I came up with: I have decided to look at the progress of the human race instead of studying its lineage. This is what I see–we are better off believing, pursuing and walking in a philosophy that tells us we came from a garden instead of a jungle.

If we follow the contentions of our dear brother, Darwin, we will justify our irrational, selfish and even destructive behavior–which wants to kill to eat.

If we hold sacred the notion of God being “breathed” into human beings, we will need to follow through on that idea by understanding that we are a people geared to planting and harvesting.

You would have to agree–there IS a massive difference.

Perhaps in a more jaded frame of mind, I would point to historical facts which might make us temporarily believe that we are more similar to our ancestors who hunted down game for survival without mercy. But there are too many examples of times when the human spirit has triumphed and snatched defeat out of the jaws of insanity for us to ignore the creative spark of generosity and holiness that seems inbred.

I think it’s really that simple. The success you will have in your life, your relationships, your family, your business and in all of your interactions with the creatures on the planet we share will be determined by whether you roam this earth as a jungle or till it as a garden.

Do I believe the entire Genesis account? I believe that we are better as gardeners than we are as high-minded, angry monkeys.

And I think somewhere along the line, whether either account is completely true or false, or a blending of one another, when it comes to pushing forward the ideals of humanity, we would do better to present ourselves as Old McDonald instead of King Kong.

Acquit

Words from Dic(tionary)

by J. R. Practix

dictionary with letter A

Acquit: (v.) 1. to free someone from a criminal charge by a verdict of not guilty 2. to conduct oneself or perform in a specified way: e.g. he needs to acquit himself well.

The word “acquit” makes me flash back to the O. J. Simpson trial in the 1990’s. Of course, if I was much younger, that might not be the case. But the memory of Johnnie Cochran saying, “If it don’t fit, you must acquit” immediately popped into my mind with the revelation of this day’s word.

To freshen your memory, the statement was made in relationship to a bloody glove discovered at the crime scene, which was placed on Mr. Simpson’s hand during the trial and seemingly was ill-fitted.

I guess that’s why the word “acquit” is an uneasy concept for me. I have to admit when I occasionally think about the idea of life after death, I don’t envision myself to be gloriously saved so much as I think of being “acquitted” by a really slick lawyer.

So after the experience with what they referred to as “the trial of the century” with O. J. Simpson, the word “acquit” leaves me a bit cold. What it connotes to me is that somehow or another, someone escaped responsibility due to a lack of evidence.

What I would hope for myself is that I would bring the evidence of my strengths AND weaknesses to the forefront BEFORE others prosecute me, making it clear that I am a mysterious balance between bungle and blessing.

Is that so hard to do? I guess it is. I would assume that our “jungle instinct” keeps us from admitting our faults, and instead, praying for an acquittal.

But of course, the danger of being acquitted is that unless you start walking the straight and narrow, you’re liable to slide off the path AGAIN–to get caught and this time, not have your fancy lawyer around anymore.

Thus the story of “The Juice.”

I think I’m going to work on being candid instead of counting on twelve people in a box deciding I’m not guilty.

Yes, that seems wiser.

Abzug

by J. R. Practix

dictionary with letter A

Abzug: Bella (1920-98) U.S. politician, lawyer and women’s rights activist. She helped to found Women Strike for Peace in 1961. Serving in Congress as a Democrat from New York, she fought for the rights of women and the poor.

Sometimes progress is so slow that we actually fail to notice that it’s going on. It is the short-sighted part of the human race that often makes us unsuitable for either the jungle or the boardroom.

But when I thought about Bella Abzug, fond memories returned. She was not exactly what you would call an attractive woman. Generous folks would have referred to her as “handsome,” and less gratuitous comments could have included “homely.”

I am certainly glad she was not around for this 24-hour news cycle, where her appearance would have been ridiculed in an attempt to render her words ineffective. That’s what we do nowadays, you know. When we are unable to contradict the objections of an intelligent spirit which has stormed into our presence, we make the attacks personal so as to dismiss their effectiveness by pointing out their physical oddities.

No, I am sure Bella Abzug would have been joked about as the classic lesbian, or mocked as someone’s “ugly grandmother.”

Often it takes people like Bella to come along to plant the seeds of discontent in order for some weeds of frustration to grow up in the midst of our neat little “social garden,” and bring attention to the fact that not everybody is going to be a “cute tomato.”

We need her. We actually need MORE like her.

I, for one, am sick and tired of only listening to people I’m supposed to agree with, who make sure that their language is so sterile that it can neither offend nor instruct.

Bella said some tough things. Bella was brash. Bella was angry. Bella believed that anger was a good thing when it was vented against stupidity.

I don’t know if a Bella Abzug could exist in our present society. We would probably put her in a back office somewhere and make her the speechwriter for some blond bimbo who could more easily acquire the vote. I don’t know if we would ever allow her a microphone, a platform or an opportunity to spit fire in our faces.

But it’s because Bella Abzug lived that women today have the opportunity to argue about their positions and be heard–because so many years ago, she pointed out the fallacy in a system that was convinced of its infallibility.

Sometimes we need to stop and be grateful for the people who live, breathe, fight and die, never seeing their dreams come to fruition. Because of their plantings and hard work, the garden still has a chance to grow.

Because of their lives, we still have a chance to overcome our ignorance.