Tag Archives: quandary

Customer

Customer: (n) a buyer; patron

I have settled an age-old conflict in my well-traveled mind.

I am weary of philosophy, bored with theology, lack the “self” to give to “help”—and I’m allergic to politics.

I have decided life is not nearly as complicated as pundits, theologians and Madison Avenue may wish to portray. You just have to decide one quandary:

Am I the customer and God the store owner?

Or am I running a little storefront and God is the customer?

Am I trying to impress God with my wares, my righteousness, my worship and my Bible study? Or is God running a pretty magnificent manufacturing plant, and merely wants me to come in and enjoy the process, learn the assembly line, pick a car of my choice which will propel me in life—and be thrilled with the quality?

You do see the difference, don’t you?

In one scenario, I am a sniveling shopkeeper, certain that the customer is going to show up, despise my ambiance and find my products inferior.

In the other case, I arrive with great anticipation to a well-oiled operation, and it’s my job to enjoy the good stuff and admire the hell out of it.

If heaven is going to be about God and me discussing my attempts at purity and goodness on Earth, it’s gonna be a snoozer.

But if I show up as a satisfied customer from one of his plants to the Central location to be further wowed by the Boss’s management skills and ingenuity?

Then, gee.

It’s almost worth dying.

 

funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

Breastfeed

j-r-practix-with-border-2

Breastfeed: (v) to feed a baby with milk from a woman’s breast

A simple standard of maturity is when we stop giggling and laughing at somebody who’s picking his nose. If we find ourselves still chortling, then we’re probably stuck somewhere in the second semester of the fourth grade.Dictionary B

The adult solution to such a quandary, to avoid becoming a giggling fool, is to turn away and not look.

Truth of the matter is, picking one’s nose is common to us all. Though some people will probably insist that they never do such a thing, the reality is that most of us, at one time or another, do a little mining for nasal gold.

Likewise, I become a bit confused when people are affronted, concerned or put off by a woman baring her breast and feeding her young one. Since we all have spent some time on the teat, it might be good to recognize that a sign of maturity is accepting this as common human effort and behavior instead of frowning or gossiping to the “teacher.”

Just look away.

Breast-feeding is here to stay–just like picking your nose.

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Brassy

j-r-practix-with-border-2

Brassy: (adj) tastelessly showy or loud in appearance or manner

How much is enough?

That may be the central concern to human life.Dictionary B

Because in hours of reflection, when opportunity is long gone, the question raised in our soul is either “did we do enough?” or “did we do too much?”

  • In a world of indifference, how much flash does it take for someone to notice your pan?
  • How many cherries before you actually have a bowl?
  • And how many sunrises before someone grabs a camera?

What does it take to draw enough attention to goodness that evil pales in comparison?

I am convinced that the promotion of a great idea is not achieved through a deluge of advertising, screaming, yelling and promotion.

Goodness, gentleness, kindness, righteousness, beauty are all required to maintain a consistency while the world overlooks them until such a time that the planet is prepared to be aware.

Therefore, the quandary is not whether there’s anything good in the world. The issue is whether goodness can survive all of the brassy critique and dark representations to finally get its chance to inherit the Earth.

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 Don’t let another Christmas season go by without owning Jonathan’s book of Christmas stories

Mr. Kringle’s Tales …26 Stories ‘Til Christmas

Only $5.99 plus $1.25 shipping and handling!

An advent calendar of stories, designed to enchant readers of all ages

“Quite literally the best Christmas stories I have ever read.” — Arthur Holland, Shelby, North Carolina

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Armed Forces

dictionary with letter A

Armed forces: (n) a country’s military forces, especially its army, navy, and air force.

I came of age in a time when joining the armed forces produced the great possibility of returning home in a body bag.

It was not very appealing–especially since I was surrounded by friends and peers who abhorred a war where other friends and peers were going–and disappearing from memory like a puff of smoke.

So even though I am greatly appreciative of those who serve our country in the military and I understand the concept, I find it difficult to celebrate any evil, even if it’s a necessary one.

Killing people is deadly, whether it’s in defense of the innocent or to follow the maddening instructions of a crazed dictator.

I know that philosophically and spiritually, there is a distinction. But since I have been around human carnage in my lifetime and can still recall the smell of blood, my stomach becomes a little queasy when too many flags are waved and too many young men and women march off for a cause.

I look for that ground where I can stand, which permits me to support the troops without ever supporting the wars. Most people will not grant me such turf. No, I must applaud the death and destruction along with the dedication and determination.

It leaves me in a quandary.

When I was a young man I had a friend named Bob who, within a two-month period, received his draft notice, went through basic training and died in battle.

It shouldn’t be that easy to kill someone. It should take more than sixty days, don’t you think?

So chalk me up as one who is tearfully appreciative of the service of my fellow-Americans as they guard against tyranny–but also as one who will struggle against another war.

 

 

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Agitation

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter AAgitation: (n) 1. a state of anxiety or nervous excitement 2. the action of briskly stirring or disturbing something, esp. a liquid

Proximity.

It’s a great word. It means how close I am to something.

Occasionally I become very upset at myself for agitating my own spirit, allowing my being to be disrupted, disoriented, and lending itself to disorganization.

It doesn’t take me long to trace the problem. I put myself in too close proximity to something that should be further away. I even have friends and family who are best suited for spending time at a distance from me and I from them, so as to maintain the mutual love and respect that we both would hate to lose.

Agitation is a proximity problem.

It is difficult for us, as human beings, to sit ourselves down in the middle of our quandary, surrounded by the tension, and still remain rational and capable of solving dilemmas. It is necessary to create distance from anxiety in order to free ourselves from worry.

That’s the truth.

I know some people would disagree, saying it’s idealistic to think we can escape the surrounding “crush of crash” in order to make adequate judgments. But I have never been able to be agitated and be anything but a jerk.

  • I need distance.
  • I need air.
  • I need the ability to turn my back on the oppression, stoop down and “fiddle in the dirt with my finger,” giving my spirit the chance to calm down, and therefore, my mind the opportunity to clear.

If you reach the point of agitation, you’ve already missed your exit off the freeway of frustration.

Pull over. Get off the highway. Don’t try to text, drink your coffee, stare down at your computer and drive your car. It only feeds the agitation.

I do believe that everything in life is a proximity decision. And when we run across something that stymies us, it doesn’t do any good to try to stare it down.

Walk out of the room, buy yourself a minute, regain your soul, escape agitation … and let the better parts of you speak the wisdom that’s available.

Afternoon

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter AAfternoon: (n) the time from noon or lunchtime to evening.

Here’s a secret: life is about uncovering your delusions and quietly correcting them before they smack you in the face.

All of us are delusional.

The difference between success and failure is whether you acknowledge your delusion, hunt down these little pieces of silliness in your soul and extract them before they diminish your true opportunities.

Let us deal with the delusion of “afternoon.”

An interesting quandary: lots of people hate the morning, insisting they aren’t “morning people,” and also would not consider doing anything in the evening, since it’s their “free time.” So they put tremendous pressure on the afternoon, when they have the least  amount of energy and possibilities, and the fewest contacts with people who are awake and ready to indulge in commerce.

Can there be a worse time to do business than from 1:00 P.M. to 4:00 P.M.? Successful people already started the ball rolling in the morning, and those who love the evening hours approach the afternoon as if it WERE morning.

You find yourself in a no man’s land.

Now, you can feel free to disagree with this assessment, and some of you probably will. But here’s what I have found to be intelligent: whether you like it or not, the morning is when things happen. If you get over the delusion that you cannot function in those early, waking hours, you can learn to take your day on and use the afternoon in a more Mexican light.

Use it for a siesta.

Since most people slow down after lunch because of high blood sugar and general fatigue, as much as you can, try to bring less importance to the afternoon and more value to it as personal time.

For instance, I take a nap.

Having risen early in the morning to write, do commerce and take care of personal affairs, after lunch I allow myself the great delight of snuggling and snoozing. When I arise in the late afternoon, I am ready for a second bout with the day, usually involving more time with friends and family.

If you live for the night you will become a vampire and suck out your own blood.

But if you live for the afternoon, you will wonder why there isn’t much business or activity going on.

If you live for the morning, you will overcome your fear of scrambled eggs and find that there are many other people, industrious in nature and wise in discovery … who will meet you there.

Adrift

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter A

Adrift: (adj) 1. of a boat or its passengers, floating without being either moored or steered. 2. Of a person, being lost or confused.

You see, I think we have a quandary. We have to learn how three words are quite different:

  • Uncaring
  • Bohemian
  • And peaceful

When I graduated from high school, I didn’t want to be normal. I had studied “normal” through twelve years of the educational system. Now, I was not critical of it. Those who found it appealing were not my enemies, but I did not get in line to take my number, waiting to be “the next one served.”

I found myself adrift. Those around me believed I was uncaring.

Not knowing what to do, I basically chose to do very little. Truthfully, I didn’t do enough to survive–at least, financially. The critics rolled in their opinions. Family was enraged. Friends deserted me.

I was on my boat and decided to float for a while instead of feverishly paddling or hooking some sort of motor up to my life so I could troll the waters of existing social acceptability.

I knew what I liked. I liked music, I liked performing and I liked writing. Was I good? Honestly, it was difficult to find out because I was always dodging the bullets of my pistol-packing townsmen, who were determined to “gun down” my laziness and put me back into submission with the grown-up way of thinking.

Yet I resisted.

Because I didn’t paddle and try to resist the tides and currents, I bumped into a lot of things, did some damage and appeared to those around me to be Bohemian.

“Adrift,” by definition, connotes a loss of control. But you see, I believe the GREATEST loss of control was giving it to someone else, who held my life as a timecard and asked me to punch in for permission to eat and breathe.

It took me about eight years to finally blend my motivation, talent, purpose and opportunities together, to come up with a lifestyle which was acceptable to those around me because it possessed some sort of pay stub.

I never resented those eight years that I was adrift. They were painful, often stupid, frightening, lonely and occasionally enlightening. They gave me the determination I needed to set a course and right my ship in a direction to follow my dreams instead of toe the line.

So even though “adrift” may seem to be a negative posture for any vessel, be it nautical OR human, for me, it was an oxymoron: a meaningful aimless quest.