Cynical

Cynical: (adj) bitterly or sneeringly distrustful, contemptuous, or pessimistic

I can’t imagine what goddamn reason I can come up with for writing these essays every day of my life.

Am I so freakishly insecure that I must beg at the feet of the inconsiderate and preoccupied?

Did I get turned down too many times in high school for dates, causing me to yearn for some glance of approval?

I don’t know.

But it certainly can’t be to win over your affection.

Do you have any? I mean, outside of your great admiration for the mirror and thousands of pictures of your children on your Facebook account.

Is there anything that moves you—except when your dog stands in a cute position just prior to pooping on your floor?

Am I really supposed to survive another season of pretending to encourage the illiterate American public to go to a voting booth to pull the lever for the person they think is the most obnoxious in his or her ads?

I don’t know what possesses my soul—if I have one—to contend that one more feeble attempt from my weary writer’s brain will perhaps dent the surface of the Planet Mars, which is level of the American public’s receptivity.

What is wrong with me?

Who would possibly care about a word from the dictionary which I happen to explore from the perspective of my journey?

Isn’t there another rerun of a remake on Netflix that could provide a binge-watch for bragging rights?

Now understand, this was not written in an effort to be cynical.

It is cynical.

funny wisdom on words that begin with a C

Boast

Boast: (v) to talk with excessive pride and self-satisfaction

Dictionary B

If doing it doesn’t give you an adequate boost of joyful satisfaction, then stop.

If you believe you need recognition, appreciation, applause or even space to perform your due diligence, you are destined to a life of sour despair.

There has to be joy in the doing, or the doing will become the burdensome chore of the malcontent.

I find that I’m only tempted to boast when I’m doing a job that really does not suit my taste and therefore needs to be bolstered by the admiration of others.

For instance, I was a writer long before I was read.

If I didn’t enjoy being a writer, I would have been absolutely miserable and would have made everyone around me fidgety as I complained about the arduous task of putting words on a screen.

I enjoyed it so I continued. If others end up finding purpose or pleasure in my phrasing and placement of notions, it’s just a magnificent manifestation.

If you find a boastful human, you will discover a soul who is not only insecure, but fearful that what they’re doing is a heap of meaningless.

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Apprise

dictionary with letter A

Apprise (v): to inform or tell someone.

So the girl you just met–who is very attractive–also has a large piece of broccoli stuck in her tooth.

  • Do you tell her?
  • Do you risk losing romantic possibilities?

You’re sitting in front of your potential boss at a job interview and he has horrible breath.

  • Do you offer him a mint?

Or you have made a severe error in calculating the family budget and have accidentally misled your wife to think that all the bills are paid.

  • Do you share with her so that she’s aware of the situation?

Ninety percent of the lying we do in life is caused by being deathly afraid and insecure about what would happen if we told the truth. Our conclusions don’t have to be realistic. After all, that is the definition for fear–an often-unmotivated sense of dread.

All we have to do is convince ourselves that the truth will not make us free, but instead, leave us stupid. At this point, we start the ugly process of elaboration.

Nobody has a situation in their past when if they had simply told the truth, a tragedy could have been averted.

So why are we afraid to apprise one another of the actual situation? It’s because we are all uncertain that anyone truly loves us.

Adam and Eve lied to God because they were unclear of the true depths of His love. That is sad.

I may not be able to have a totally clean relationship with everybody I know, but I certainly should practice candor with those who I am content love me.

  • Would I tell the girl that she had broccoli in her teeth? Probably not–unless I was willing to lose a dating possibility.
  • Would I tell my potential future boss that he had bad breath? Probably not, but shamefully, I would gossip about him later.
  • Would I tell my wife about the mistake in the budget? Absolutely–or the relationship is a joke.

I would hope that eventually I would apprise the broccoli girl of her tooth obstruction with a bit of flair.

I also would like to learn to offer the mint to my superior without feeling intimidated.

And I think the best way to achieve this status is to begin to apprise those I love of our true heart instead of making up fake emotion, and desperately trying to pretend it’s authentic. 

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Adonai

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter AAdonai: (n) Hebrew name for God

He said to me, “That’s Mr. Jones to you.”

He was like, four years older than me, but a real pompous type. I know it’s not a good thing to say, but I immediately hated him.

I don’t like it when people make a fuss over their titles and names. I don’t trust them. I find them insecure. And the truly great people I have met in my life have always come back when I’ve tried to call them by some proper terminology. Yes–they’ve always asked me to just call them by their first name.

It’s why i have problems with things like “Adonai.” Do you know why the Jews came up with “Adonai,” meaning master? It’s because they weren’t allowed to say God’s name.

What a stuffed shirt! Really?? I know you’re God. I know that’s special. But are you really going to insist that people use initials for you or come up with other terms so your name won’t be defiled in some way??

I just don’t buy it–because if you’re God and you’re great, why do you need to keep convincing people of your greatness? It would be like a famous actor name-dropping other famous actors around friends so as to remind them how great he is. What a jerk.

So I am not convinced that a lot of the things we believe about God are really Godly. They’re certainly not confident. And they’re definitely not benevolent. And they REEK of piety and insecurity.

I am so glad that when Jesus came to earth, he said, “Relax. Stop calling Him by all these weird names. He’s Father. He’s Daddy.”

Yes, I get a little uncomfortable in our American culture at times, when parents insist that their offspring refer to them as “sir” and “ma’am.”

Maybe it’s respectful. But it’s also annoying.

Isn’t “Dad” better? Isn’t “Mom” preferable?

So even though I know that “Adonai” is a term of reverence from Judaism, I really cannot accept a God who insists that His name be revered instead of his position as my friend and father being honored.

So maybe fear of God is a good thing, but somewhere along the line … you have to stop being scared.