Clincher

Clincher: (n) a fact, argument, or event that settles a matter conclusively.

I often tell audiences that the best way to refrain from being an asshole and judging other folks is to maintain a profile of realization.

And here’s the realization: when you discover that people are unable to own up to mistakes and make a clean breast of an unfortunate event,
you can quietly walk away so as to not be around when they blow up.

It’s a clincher.

Although some people extol the beauty of morality and others pride themselves on pursuing perfection, those who possess great Earthly wisdom comprehend that failure is imminent and is only survived through repentance.

I don’t argue with people about this. Some travelers think it’s their job to convince others of the error of their ways. Yet there are enough pitfalls, stumbling blocks and quicksand available in the jungle that it is completely unnecessary for me to cut the legs out from under a friend or enemy.

It’s a clincher.

Wait and see what happens when someone falls short of the mark. What do they do? If they choose to rationalize, blame others or try to explain in painful detail why it is not exactly their fault, then you should give them an anemic smile.

Back your way out of the room and get away from the destruction that will soon be their life.

 

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Clergyman

Clergyman: (n) a male priest, minister, or religious leader, especially a Christian one

All the mistakes I’ve made in my life were caused by me thinking that what I had to offer was not enough.

Whenever I calmed down and realized that the stash in my duffel bag was the total subsistence of my life and journey, I was fine.

But when I allowed myself to be intimidated by forces around me which deemed my offering to be meager because it lacked some
certification, I always ended up either a fool or a liar.

I wanted to help people.

I wanted to use my art to do so.

I wanted to share a message that had humor, hope and heft.

But I also once was very young, and contended that I needed some title to punctuate my adequacy.

Since I did not go to college, I wasn’t allowed to be called “a Reverend.” Therefore I could not be a clergyman.

I don’t know why I wanted to pursue such a position–I guess I just wanted folks to be impressed when they heard the full extent of my resume spoken in a word: “minister.”

So I lied. I manufactured higher learning. And eventually I just called myself a “Reverend” even though I didn’t have any pedigree to bark out spirituality.

It took me many years to escape the foolishness of my insecurity. As soon as I did, I realized that being a clergyman was actually to my disadvantage, because my music, writing, dramatic pursuits and screenplays were much more effective tools for reaching my brothers and sisters than climbing into a pulpit and emoting.

I often think, what is it I’m doing today that’s equally as stupid as my pursuit of being a false cleric?

I don’t know. But I keep looking.

Because if I catch it early, maybe I can avoid some of the embarrassment that occurs when people finally find out the truth.

And…

They always do.

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Boo-boo

Boo-boo: (n) a minor mistake.

I think maybe you’re a little confused.Dictionary B

It’s understandable since you don’t necessarily know all the rules that have been established by my thinking. Let’s clarify:

You make mistakes. I had a boo-boo.

You are inconsiderate. I just didn’t notice.

You are really late. I was unavoidably delayed in traffic.

You are selfish. I was unaware.

You are a sinner. I am a victim of circumstance.

You are a bigot. I just have more experience with those types of people.

You are a hater. I’m just trying to point out some grievous errors.

You cheat. I misunderstood the directions.

You’re a big, fat flirt. I’m friendly.

You are a religious fanatic. I just know the Bible.

You are a political idiot. I am pulsing the new trends.

You have really bad breath. I had pasta for lunch.

You are getting fat. I am finding my natural body weight.

You are ugly. I have classical features.

You seem to fail at everything you do. I’m looking for my niche.

Now, is this clear? Because I wouldn’t want you to go through the rest of your life confused.

 

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Balm

Balm:(n) a fragrant ointment or preparation used to heal or soothe the skin.Dictionary B

Dried out.

The skin begins to flake and fall off because of a lack of moisture.

Got it. Some lotion, or balm, is very helpful. You also might want to drink some water.

But in like manner, our society is dried out. Pardon the expression, but we’ve become quite flaky.

To sit around and discuss the condition or lament our dryness seems futile.

We need a balm–something to spread all over us which will moisturize us and make us pliable to reason and willing to at least consider the truth. Those noble souls who are willing to bring that ointment to our society will certainly be doing the work of the angels.

So what is the balm?

I will give you a little secret. There are two things you can do which totally change the complexion of the human beings around you:

Don’t worry.

Don’t hurry.

Everything bad that happens in our lives occurs because we are worrying or complaining when opportunity knocks on the door, or we’re in such a hurry that we make stupid mistakes.

It’s no more complicated than that.

If you’re going to spend all your time hurrying to solve a problem that’s come up and the rest of the time, worrying about the next problem around the corner, you will be undesirable and a real flake.

Just bringing a non-worrisome attitude without hurrying is a balm of healing to our times.

  • Stop preaching.
  • Stop praying so much.
  • Stop trying to find the new solution to the old problem.

Don’t worry. Don’t hurry.

You will anoint every situation with newness … and bring “fresh skin” to the human race.

 

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