Tag Archives: finance

Annotate

dictionary with letter A

Annotate: (v) to add notes of explanation to a text or diagram

It is my contention that education is knowledge followed by experience. It can even be experience that gradually garners knowledge.

But the idea that the more information imparted to us, with a variety of opinions, insights, notes, complete with bibliography, will make us smarter, is a bit erroneous.

I’m not so sure we learn until we take something that we kind of basically understand–and then try it ourselves.

Does anyone really become an engineer when they graduate from college, or does that actually occur some Thursday morning three years later, while working on the job?

I think this is particularly annoying in the fields of business and religion. So many books, commentaries, opinions and guides for the novice are penned in these categories, with the aspiration that an insight from someone other than ourselves will give us an edge.

Of course, we need to know what we’re talking about, and have a basic understanding of what we’re doing. But candidly, it is in the handling of circumstance and difficulty that we discover the true wisdom of each and every endeavor.

I grow weary of a culture that creates a learning class, which receives more finance than a working class that actually pulls the load. And not only finance–but status.

Case in point:

  • I studied music. It didn’t make me a musician. Somewhere in my third set, playing keyboard in a dive, discovering a new bridge chord, I gained the confidence to have the music in me.
  • I studied the Bible. It didn’t make me a Christian. It was a series of encounters, where I chose to think for myself and selected to bless instead of curse, when the mind of Christ actually inhabited my cranium.
  • I even studied sex in an attempt to become a better lover, but it was on the 121st attempt to please my partner through sensitivity that I actually had the words “Don Juan” whispered in my ear.

Notes are good. Testimonies are interesting.

But none of us are saved by someone else’s experience. The salvation of our lives … is the word of our own testimony.

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Thank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) —  J.R. Practix

Analyze

dictionary with letter A

Analyze: (adj) relating to or using analysis or logical reasoning.

Perhaps we should print signs.

It may be a bit cumbersome but certainly would be helpful in reminding us what exactly is the right procedure in a given situation.

One sign should read: Analyze

The other sign should warn: Please do not analyze.

Mixing these two up is what creates some of the more awkward and even tense moments in our day.

For instance, if you come home and your ten-year-old is sitting in his soccer uniform, dejected and pouting, and you use your laser insight to realize he must have lost his game, it is probably not the best time to sit down and become analytical about the game of soccer or go outside to practice kicks and moves. It is time for a bowl of popcorn, a hug and a funny video.

Likewise, if you were to return to your abode and your wife asked you to sit down and discuss a problem she was having in the household, it would be unfortunate to decide to launch into a tickle-fest.

Do we analyze or do we just allow ourselves to feel? The right answer brings understanding; the wrong one lends itself to retaliation.

For after all, trying to be flippant over things that need an analytical touch makes us appear calloused and useless to those who are hurt or abused.

  • War — analytical
  • Kissing — not
  • Abortion — analytical
  • Parenting — not so much
  • Finance — a little of both

So you can see, the true definition of maturity is knowing when to be analytical and when to allow yourself to escape the prison of logic … and run free as long as you possibly can.

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Thank you for enjoying Words from Dic(tionary) —  J.R. Practix

Allowance

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter A

Allowance: (n) a sum of money paid regularly to a person

I had to get out my educated pencil. (I am often glad that my writing tool sought higher education, since I didn’t.)

Having an educated instrument, I can take my meager abilities in mathematics and join with this smart pencil and come up with some fascinating figures.

Case in point: when I was eleven years old, my father reluctantly gave me twenty-five cents a week for allowance. Actually, he held a quarter out in front of me and always offered at least two or three regrets and four or five warnings about the value of money and how important it was to spend it wisely.

But you must realize, this was at a time when twenty-five cents would buy you five candy bars.

This was my allowance.

In comparison, when I lived in Hendersonville, Tennessee, with my children, I gave each one of them fifteen dollars a week. Making use of my magical pencil of intellect, I realize that this was very similar to the quarter I received when I was eleven. For now a decent candy bar at a convenience store can cost upwards to $1.50 to $2.00, and everything else is equally as inflated.

So which is better? To have a little bit of money with lots of possibilities, or have a lot of money with little possibility?

I also recall that by the time I reached my sixteenth birthday and wanted to go out on a date with a girl, my dad, who was now ailing from cancer, proudly handed me over a five-dollar bill for my first date. Similarly, when one of my young men in high school was going to be taking out a lady, it was necessary for me to give him three ten-dollar bills, which he still grumbled at, saying that he would have to really scrimp for dinner.

I know that the root word of “allowance” is “allow.” But even as a grown-up, I am learning that it is possible to simplify your finance even in the midst of raging increases. You don’t have to feel like you’re cheating yourself. Just “pass” on opportunities that don’t give you the payoff you desire.

For instance, when the alarming transition occurred and candy bars went from a nickel to a dime, I had to negotiate my purchases much more carefully, while waiting for the eventuality that my parents would catch on … and pop me up to fifty cents.

 

Allocate

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter A

Allocate: (v) to distribute duties or resources for a particular purpose.

I have discovered over the years that the best way for me to move forward in success and personal appeal is to extract as much fussiness from my ego and body language as humanly possible.

Even though we will occasionally tolerate a bit of sassiness in one another, we eventually grow weary in well-doing and begin to plot the social death of such aggravating creatures.

With that in mind, I cautiously present to you that one of my pet peeves is the word “allocate.”

I don’t like to be allocated.

Over the years I have acquired a toleration for the process because I live in a world where progress is ignored in favor of the worship of committees. Sometimes I feel it might be better if chaos, anarchy, or at least wild abandon permeated our species, and we spent more time correcting our mistakes than we do planning our indecision.

Just the action of “allocating” has an arrogance to it–as if we have asked God to step down from His throne and allow us to be Kings for a Day.

Let me be the first (or maybe the second) to shout aloud: “I don’t know what I’m doing!”

It isn’t that I lack experience, or that I’m less intelligent than you. It’s just that I’m fully aware that allocating love, finance, mission, mercy or direction to other people is well beyond my expertise.

I am extraordinarily suspicious of those who pull on a tie, sport a smug grin and in great detail explain why certain things can not happen because they can’t be “allocated in this environment.”

As I said, it is a bit of fussiness. And I am certainly not opposed to hearing good counsel or even being submissive to the powers that be.

But for God’s sake, can we say we really believe in a Divine Creator if we never ask Him to do anything that doesn’t add up on our human-held abacus?

  • If I don’t ask God to lift weights that are heavier than my allocation, what’s the purpose of prayer?
  • And if I don’t think you can do more than what I think you can, based upon the limitations I have placed upon you, what is the value of friendship?

I am sure the intentions of “allocate” are good–and I will try to be less growly on these subjects.

But for the time being, I will continue to leave “allocate” and all of his relatives off my Christmas card list.

Alimony

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter A

Alimony: (n) a husband or wife’s court-ordered provision for a spouse after a divorce.

It comes down to discovering when it is permissible to be emotional. I personally think it is good to be emotional about spiritual things:

  • Loving your neighbor as yourself.
  • Feeling compassion for those in need.
  • And getting more juiced up about singing the praises of life instead of droning out a dull hymn.

On the other hand, when it comes to matters of the heart, I think running our lives solely on emotional data is very dangerous. Basically, the typical American marriage runs in three phases:

  1. You are so hot I can’t keep my hands off you.
  2.  It’s been a while since we’ve been hot–maybe we should get our hands on each other.
  3. Hands off.

The reason this happens is because we don’t take into consideration the many aspects of marriage other than sexual ecstacy. Let me tell you what I think the four things are that make up a good marriage, and how I believe each one is perfectly balanced by keeping an eye on the others.

1. Sex. Actually, I think it should be in fourth place, because it turns out that it’s better after the other three have been enacted with fervor. But I’ll keep it at the top of the list to keep your interest in my article.

2. Finance. Partnering with someone else is often a good way to stay solvent. If not, you have to start doing things like paying child support, alimony and lawyers to be your mouthpiece.

3. Status. Our society is set up for people to be together, work together, plan together and even interact fiscally in pairs.

4. Children. Once you give up on a marriage, whether you like it or not, the earthquake sends aftershocks through the entire family. You can fake it, act mature, and present yourselves as upbeat individuals who can maintain two or three different lives, but even though divorce and child custody are practiced in our society, our art and entertainment more truthfully portray them as implausible.

If two intelligent people will figure out a way to hold things together because of the children, consider the status they have by being united, garner the potential of the second income, and then take a bit of giddiness from the three discoveries into the bedroom, you might be surprised how many people could stay together, instead of chasing the dream of new genitalia.

Yes, being adult is considering the plus and the minus in every situation, and discovering a great compromise. Short of abuse or neglect, marriage can avoid alimony by appreciating what we’ve got and working with it, knowing that just like the seasons … hot and cold come in their time.

Afloat

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter A

Afloat: (adv) floating in water, not sinking

There is one great advantage to being a fat dude (other than the joy you achieve in chomping your way to the status quo…) When I go into the deep end of a pool, I am able to stand without needing to tread water … and float.

Matter of fact, one day I was doing just that and a guy swimming nearby me paused and stared at me in a combination of wonder and horror, and finally worked up the courage to ask, “How are you doing that?”

Feeling a bit of mischief in my heart, I replied, “Sometimes I get tired of walking on top of the water and I ease down to rest.”

The humor escaped him.

The reason I stay afloat is because I have enough lard stored in my tissue  that it creates a buoyancy which lifts me up in the current. Now, I am not suggesting that this is adequate motivation for risking the perils of obesity. But there is something wonderful about finding a way to be afloat without having to constantly struggle.

Matter of fact, I’ve tried to duplicate the sensation in other areas of my life:

  • With my family. I have raised my sons, and now it’s up to them to figure out what parts of what I shared were valuable and what was crap. I should relax.
  • With the people I meet. I can’t judge them, change them or ignore them. So instead, I will play a game and find ways love them.
  • With my finance. Great ideas offer the possibility of work, which if performed excellently, normally renders financial gain.
  • And with my art. Write it, sing it, share it, live it, believe it and leave the rest to the whim of God.

The best way to “stay afloat” is to be chubby with good cheer, instead of lean and mean … with despair.

 

Affluent

Words from Dic(tionary)

dictionary with letter AAffluent: (adj.) having a great deal of wealth or money

For ten years of my life I was affluent.

I lived in a big house, had extra finance, drove really neat cars and spent money on expensive lunches which I dubbed “business.”

Most of the money I utilized was not of my own making. It was inherited. It still spent the same.

I built a swimming pool in my back yard, had a gazebo in my front, and even constructed artistic decking to get from my house to the pool

What can I tell you about being affluent?

  • It’s like being poor except you only worry about money half the time.
  • You spend less of your thought process wondering if you should buy the T-bone steaks that are on sale, but you still get a bit of indigestion when you realize how much cash you extracted from your bank account–just to eat grilled cow.
  • There is a greater sense of loss, and much more pressure to reimburse what you’re spending because otherwise, you cannot continue the absolute facade of affluence.

I will not tell you that it was absent charm. I certainly will not tell you it was devoid of excitement. AND I will not be so pretentious as to lead you to believe that if it were offered to me again as an option for my ongoing existence, that I would not leap, in a stumbling way, in that direction.

But I can say that it really doesn’t matter.

Because of the money that I had, the thing I rejoice over more than anything else is that much of it was given away to others to produce lasting glee. There is something wonderful about knowing that twenty dollars does not mean much to you personally, but to another individual who is working minimum wage, it is a heavenly gift floated down on gossamer wings.

Pretty damn fantastic.

So I continue to work hard–not to build another swimming pool or purchase another gazebo hand-built by the Amish–but to make sure that I have enough coinage in my purse to surprise those souls who worked harder than they should have for less than what they’re worth.

I have maintained the best part of being affluent: I still get a gas out of giving.

Addiction

Addiction: (n.) the condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing or activity: e.g. an addiction to gamblingdictionary with letter A

Being mortal, flawed, and yet inexplicably granted intelligence, I often find myself wanting to attribute all negative vices to others while retaining virtue unto myself. It is one of those conditions in the human race that we often refer to when awkwardly explaining our inadequacy or even calloused behavior. In other words:

“You’re addicted. I’M passionate.”

“You are disemboweled and disenfranchised by your actions. I am in the pursuit of diverse choices.”

Sometimes the best way to assist others is to find similar difficulties in ourselves. For instance, I don’t understand why people want to put a stick of tobacco in their mouth and light it up, setting their lungs ablaze. They are probably just as baffled about why I continue to eat when the meal is already completed. Yet I would be willing to justify MY actions as “harmless” while condemning theirs as evil.

No one in this society will ever be able to have mercy, and therefore grant finance, to aid those who are addicted until we are willing to admit the addictions that have crept into our own activities and our willpower.

Candidly, I don’t eat because I’m hungry. So when I see an advertisement on television, explaining how some pill or exercise will curb your appetite, I just laugh.

  • I eat for kicks and pleasure.
  • I eat because it comes to my mind that there is some food in the refrigerator yet unconsumed
  • I eat for entertainment.
  • I eat for reward.

In so doing, I allow food to dictate some of the policy of my life. It is the definition for addiction–at least in my opinion:

If any activity begins to put together your personal calendar and you find yourself shifting your efforts in favor of those choices, then you’re probably dealing with some form of addiction.

There are three things necessary to take care of addiction:

1. A climate where confession is greeted by appreciation instead of judgment.

2. An understanding that willpower is never enough without the support of others.

3. Failure is inevitable, success is rare and the race will go to he who endures to the end.

Addiction CAN be beat, but it will do well when the dictionary does not tie it to drugs and gambling, but instead, points it out as human selections of all sorts … gone awry.

 

Abeokuta

by J. R. Practix

dictionary with letter A

Abeokuta: a city in southwestern Nigeria, capital of the state of Ogun; pop. 308,800

You see, all he wanted to do was give out Bibles to natives. He certainly wasn’t interested in acquiring finance. His only concern was to provide the Word of God to lost souls in Nigeria who did not have any way of learning the truth of the salvation plan because they lacked a book to explain it to them.

He wrote me a lengthy letter to share his vision and also reinforce his credentials, listing numerous universities and organizations which were most definitely acquainted with his passion.

I was about eight or nine long paragraphs into this plea from Africa, when suddenly my the writer pointed out to me that even though he was not interested in money, a certain amount of cash would be necessary–along with the shipment of Bibles–as a tariff on all products from America, even if they were in black covers stamped with the word “Holy.”

So along with sending him a hundred Bibles, it would be necessary for me to include a wire transfer of $250 to cover those taxes and charges, so as to ensure that some desperately befuddled Nigerian would receive illumination from on high.

As a courtesy, he included the procedure by which I should transfer these funds–as soon as possible–even before the Bibles were shipped! After all, who knows when the monies would  be needed?

I do believe he was from Abeokuta.

I must confess to you, heathen that I am, I passed on this remarkable opportunity, kept my bank account intact and was forced to resort to a simple prayer for all those potentially damned Nigerians, who would be vacant of redemption due to the absence of my Bible shipment.

Such events do not make me cynical. They actually serve to make me more voracious in my appetite to find the authentic.